A SHARK'S TALE

Right after the Rio de Janeiro Carnival of 2022, two humpback whales went cruising down the Antarctic Circumpolar Current towards the Pacific Ocean. While on their way to Australia - from Brazil - when arriving at the South Pacific Gyre, one humpback whale, by the name of Mordor asked the other humpback whale, “Ooooooh oooooh oooooh?” The other humpback whale, named Morgoth replied, “Eeeeee eeeee eeeee!”

Moments later, a great white shark watching this conversation take place interrupted saying, “Mmmmm mmmm mmmm!”

Startled by the interruption. Mordor and Morgoth take off through the gyre into Byron Bay where there were many surfers:

Noticing the ruckus, one surfer said to the others while scratching their head, “Dude... like... it’s really hot.”

Another surfer replied, “Yeah, dude... like... this climate change issue thing, really has to like…. Change. I wonder if I should just get rid of the suit.”

The third surfer interjects, saying, “Naw, dude.... like... the suit protects us from the storm. You don’t know what’s out there... dude???”

“Whoa... look dude... are those like... two humpbacks?” The fourth surfer asks. “Whoooaaa dude.... you’re right.... like....two humpbacks, I wonder where they came from. It’s like.... they came out of nowhere.”

The fifth adds. “Yeah... Sherlock... it’s like... whales just came out of the Earth’s core... like … without a quake. Like... how does that happen.... dude?”

Walking along the beach, two young women were walking looking for a place to sit for a barbecue. Looking out at the sea, one of the women said to the other:

“Wow, how beautiful it is today, the sky is as blue as the ocean.”

The other woman, replied with a question: “OMG, are those humpbacks and why are they yelling?!!!”

“Well, isn’t that what they do? Don’t all animals make unnecessary noises?” The first woman asks rhetorically.

“No, not all, it’s usually because of something.”

“Yeah, it’s because they're animals!” The first snaps back at the second.

"Becky, why are you always belligerent?!!!" The second snaps back at the first. "You called me out here because Chris dumped you, and as your friend I told you I would just hang out for a while. All of a sudden, everything is an argument."

"No, it's not an argument, I'm the one with a doctorate in marine biology." Becky replies.

"Yeah, so, I'm a medical doctor... so... what are you saying?" the second responds.

"Sarah, if you don't stop right now, I will call the beach police. I study marine life, you study humans... Why do you think you're smarter than me?"

"Is that... what this is about? So, you mean to tell me that you're still upset because Chris Hemsworth liked me before you??? It was over 20 years ago... When we were in high school!!!"

"Yeah, it was over 20 years ago and you're still after him!" Becky shouts back.

Upset at the accusation, Sarah screams, "You really need to grow up. Chris and I are just friends. He called me when he broke up with you. He said that you cheated on him and he caught you red-handed at dinner. You mean to tell me that you went to the Le Pierre de Roi Arturo Le Restaurant with his best friend???!!!! In a five - star resort????!!! What happened after the meal????!!!"

Picking up her cell phone, Becky calls the beach police, "Hello... hello... yes... yes..., I would like to report someone. Her name is Sarah Wiklowski. We are by one of the barbecue pits... Byron Bay... No, I don't know which way it is... do I look like I have a map???!!!"

Directly across the women, were two sea turtles inside the deep of Byron Bay. One said to the other:

“My GOD, look at that great white shark going after those two humpbacks!!!”

The other said, “Yeah, let’s get the heck out of here, and hide!!!”

Copyright 2022, Rev. Nnedi Iwuchukwu, BA, M.MSC., LMT, LMI