My Superhero Universe

I've tried writing this so many times already. Not just the story itself, with all its plot points and characters and delicious little scenes that don't really make sense to anyone but me (at least not yet, unless/until it someday goes public...) but also the descriptions of it! Practicing a publication pitch; drafting a quick overview page or zine, to share with peers at cons or just get myself organized; blurbs and excerpts for my art website and noveling month profile; or like, what would that spiffy little elevator pitch be - for an idea that's so expansive?

Yes, there's one "main character" who wants to be a superhero, in a world oversaturated with powered people, and we follow his entertaining rise & fall. He's a former child villain (think child star) who played sidekick to his dad, until a mix of teen rebellion, noble heart, and desire for redemption has led him to register with a hero agency and actively strategize a rise to the top. Punches a squid monster, gets his own nemesis, interns with a popular team, starts his own motley crew, recruits reformed nemesis, outed by the press, etc. Thing is, this isn't just about him. As the concept fleshed out, everyone had complex relationships, cool backstories, scenes where he isn't even "on set". His is the main throughline, catalyst, and connecting tissue perhaps, but their world exists as a "universe" on par with the types of stories that inspired it.

Why does it remain unfinished? What holds it back? Even those answers have transformed over the years, and examining this unsettling disconnect within a perpetual work-in-progress has actually become my prevalent form of writing. I began to examine the very process of cultivating a multi-faceted project, from detailed decisions about character motivation, to hitting (or missing) expected milestones, fulfilling broader life goals, describing the whole artistic journey.

So tonight is just one more attempt to tell that version of the story. I've been trying for weeks now, eyeing this "Not Quite There" challenge on the horizon, seeing how it dovetailed so well with the Make More Comics grant application, envisioning this as the gathering place to finally present these efforts properly, amidst a rare opportunity to actually get compensated for a patchwork project that has - and may forevermore defy - the parameters of a polished "product." But hopefully, in the best of ways.

Do I copy/paste my prior attempts to explain? There's no time for that now! Editing them will take longer than answering off the cuff, as the clock runs down and door I'm running toward is inches from closing. Besides, each new iteration reveals something new that can fuse into future statements.

Let's go back to the beginning, shall we? The first seed of an idea, I actually tried to neglect. Back in art school, my studies were a priority, and my stories constantly lived in my head, but they were always playing second-fiddle. Multiple stories, so many that I had even started trying to rank those in priority, to weed out which were worth my time. This one was a side thing. Sprung from my love/hate feelings for the superhero genre and its pre-existing lore, tropes, and flaws, then set off by a silly parody movie that lampooned them, I suddenly discovered a path forward for me... and refused to take it. Then the pesky thing kept growing.

Eventually, had to acknowledge it was a frontrunner, hit the top 5 or whatever. But like many of my stories, it suffered incompletion. The concept best fit the format of a long-running comic or graphic novel, but all the parts needed to cooperate smoothly. Like a jigsaw puzzle, it formed in bunches, where every piece must be accounted for before anything could be called "finished." Something was always missing, meanwhile my brain sought the next challenge. With several "puzzles" going at once, this one proved most ambitious of all.

Originally, it was my own creative limits and blocks that tripped me up. As I learned to work through those, improve my skills and expand my perceptions, it was dwindling resources of time and funding that did me in. I would adapt, get creative within the new parameters, but it was never fast enough to keep pace with how convoluted my circumstances had become. Certainly, this trained me out of bad habits and trained me into entirely new ways of working. This opened my eyes to how precious a few stupid little minutes could be, and how far I could stretch the smallest of dollars, and paying attention to the small fortuitous circumstances that might push me just a little further.

Truly, I did want to pinpoint each twist and turn. But I suppose that IS the actual book I'm fighting for time to assemble and find funding for at this point. Suffice to say that what was once a "comic/graphic novel" endeavor DID become a few slices of that within a few years. Then lost steam, but revisited, when I "adapted my non-existent comic into a non-existent novel" + interactive art exhibit, when National Novel Writing Month coincided with a "Heroes & Villains" themed gallery show, where I hosted a registration desk for the superhero agency, as if that's a real thing. This narrative concept became my favorite topic to expound on, when writers groups pondered why we write. It became weird implosions of itself, when I applied for a fiction-writing grant, and felt it could no longer exist without the context of its making. But since that's not fiction, I had to fictionalize myself yet again.

Now it mostly resurfaces as short stories on the Vocal platform, one of which has been prototyped for printing as an illustrated booklet. Becomes my pitch for grants. It's been dismantled into bite-size bits, and fights my hundreds of mini-projects for scraps of non-existent time. But every time it seems to have been snuffed out, it does the phoenix thing. Or just keeps fulfilling the classic genre trope of a character that you've seen meet their dire end, but somehow never actually dies.

Stories readable on Vocal.media that fall within the "universe":

Prose version of Issue #1, retells and fully continues 2012 Preview book, submitted to the challenge where stories take place in one minute's time - https://vocal.media/fiction/a-minute-s-difference?via=ellen.stedfeld

Short continuation of the scene after, aka Chapter or Issue #2 - https://vocal.media/fiction/the-journey-begins-2k9a0r3o?via=ellen.stedfeld

Backstory of his parents' meet-cute, retold for 200-word heist challenge - https://vocal.media/fiction/the-bonus-heist

For visual consistency (and lack of time) used same banner image x3 for stories that feature his "villainous" nemesis who eventually joins the team - https://vocal.media/fiction/come-see-the-monstrosity?via=ellen.stedfeld https://vocal.media/fiction/a-change-of-heart-a4qs0zk5?via=ellen.stedfeld

NOT having new art ready for this one actually motivated The Kraken's Ire illustrated booklet, whose text is a color-enhanced printing of this story - https://vocal.media/fiction/the-kraken-s-ire?via=ellen.stedfeld

Referenced while ruminating on art & life challenges, for Vocal challenges - https://vocal.media/humans/cultivating-creativity?via=ellen.stedfeld https://vocal.media/writers/have-i-written-anything?via=ellen.stedfeld https://vocal.media/poets/artist-undoubtedly?via=ellen.stedfeld https://vocal.media/art/vocal-izing-2024?via=ellen.stedfeld https://vocal.media/motivation/fresh-resolve?via=ellen.stedfeld https://vocal.media/humans/broken-buckets?via=ellen.stedfeld

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My art & illustration website is perpetually evolving as a project of its own, with pockets of information and pages that need revision/reorganization, but here's more to look at:

Pages from 2012 booklets "Sidescape" and "When Life's Just Super (Preview) - https://www.ellesaurarts.com/sidescape https://www.ellesaurarts.com/when-life-s-just-super-2012

Descriptions of the interactive novel gallery display and NaNoWriMo - https://www.ellesaurarts.com/interactive-novels https://www.ellesaurarts.com/heroesvillains