Who's the real Monster?

Tears streamed freely down my face. All I could think of was I can never have a child of my own, I will never feel life growing inside me.

I had given up on my dreams of ever having a family of my own since the first night. Now that choice was ripped away from me. Tracing the scar with my finger tips I lifted my shirt to see it. A soul tearing sob escaped my lips. Tendrils formed from my shadow to smashing everything close by.

When my lungs demanded air I began to breathe heavily. "Z-Z are you ok?" an all too familiar voice asked me. Raising my eyes to see Ed towering over me while keeping their distance. Holding his gaze I tried to talk only for my voice to break. I resorted to shake my head in response.

They took a couple of steps forward to ask "What happened? Is there anything I can do?"

Shaking my head again Ed got down on their knees to hold his arms wide open. Rushing into them I continued to cry and sob into his chest all the while he held me tightly.

I didn't know that my body was shaking until I felt them hold me tighter. Nightmare asked What is this? Replying Comfort. Nightmare said It feels nice. I was about to say something when I felt Nightmare leave my body.

"Did you come here to feed?" Nightmare asked Nurse, no Emilia.

Breaking away from Ed to see that Nightmare had taken on the same human form from my mind perfectly. My favorite singer. A very tall muscular man, who had long dark almost black hair, a face that had you not known would've thought it was carved by a master sculptor, with a deep voice.

"Who or what is that?" Ed whispered to me. Nightmare turned around to glare at him. Feeling Ed tense in my grasp I returned the glare as I replied "That's Nightmare in human form."

Nightmare huffed before looking from me to Emilia. "What about her?" Nightmare asked me. "Leave us I'll handle her" I said. Feeling Nightmare trying to resist I sent a command Now. Nightmare reluctantly grunted before walking to the edge of my shadow to disappear.

Ed asked trying to keep the quiver from their voice "Everything ok?" Looking into their eyes I saw genuine worry. Clearing my throat I replied honestly "It's going to be a long time until everything is ok. As of right now there's nothing to worry about." Staying in their arms I moved my eyes to Emilia. "What do you want?" I asked. She looked from me to Ed before responding "I need to talk with you."

Noticing that her face was back to normal I had my own questions for her. Catching Alexia leaning against the wall watching everything I looked up to Ed "I need a moment alone with Emilia." They asked confused "Emilia? You really want to talk with Nurse Ratchet even after she did this to you" he touched my left elbow to finish their statement.

Keeping my eyes on Ed's face I waited for them to look at mine. "Don't worry about me" I told him as I lowered my arms to hold his hands. Watching Ed's face soften I could see conviction in their eyes as he said "I'll be in ear shot in case you need anything." Giving his hands a gently squeeze in response I replied "I know."

Watching Ed walk away as Emilia got closer I saw him restrain themselves from shoulder checking her. A prickling sensation went down my left arm. Looking down to see that Nightmare used a shadow tendril to cover the word we were both labeled as.

Emilia saw the subtle action to ask "How did you do that?" Nightmare took over my voice to answer "I did that." She took a step back in shock. Nightmare continued "If you ever lay a hand on Z that'll be the last thing you do with that hand ever again." Watching her visibly shudder I gave Emilia a moment to collect herself.

Speaking with my own voice I asked "What did you want to tell me?" Emilia fiddled with her hands as she was in the process of responding "I wanted to start off with apologizing." Feeling my brow furrow I let her go on "Words can't explain what I did to you. There are no excuses I could ever say that would justify my actions. I really am sorry for hurting you." Her eyes drifted to my forearms. "I felt you in my head with Alexia. I know you saw some of the things the guards did to me. I also know you saw my actual face." For a moment the scar became visible. "One of them did this to me. A scientist put nanobots inside me to test out the quality. The little machines subside with force and distress." Emilia inhaled deeply to calm her nerves for the scar to be hidden again. "I know you meant it, from before" she turned back to see Alexia still there waiting for her. Nightmare asked me Are you really going to let her get off easily? I took a moment to respond She's a victim like the rest of us.

"Is that all?" I asked Emilia. She shook her head before replying "I also wanted to say thank you for believing me and for not hurting Alexia." I looked over to her for a second then met Ed's eyes. They still looked worried. I gave them a thumbs up and he gave a nod in response. Bringing my attention back to Emilia she finished with "I know you and the others hate me, for a good reason no less. I honestly plan on spending my remaining years here out of sight unless needed. I will need to see Hannah soon though, for personal medical stuff. Oh god why can't I ever say what I need to say."

Taking in a deep breath I had to calm my own nerves to keep from walking away. "I know it's no where nearly the same" Emilia said touching her right cheek. "I just need you to know that I really am sorry for what some sick freak did to you. I can't heal your wound, but I can help with the pain your feeling." Taking a moment to think if I could ever trust her I replied "No. This pain is mine to keep. With this scar I'm going to make the people who imprisoned us, tortured us, and did even worse things pay. I don't need or want your pity or sympathy."

"I understand, I'll still be here if you need me for anything" Emilia said taking a step back. Sizing her up I said "Since you offered I'm going to have you deal with Anderson for now. You will be in charge of getting, giving, and retrieving her food, along with clothing, plus all toiletries that come with her living here from on." She replied "Anderson is still alive?" With a roll of my eyes I said "Yes, I want her alive and in one piece. I'll deal with Edgar."

A wave of confusion followed by worry made the nanobots on her face shimmer with distortion. Emilia could only nod in response. Seeing that I wasn't the only one who caught sight of her distress Alexia started walking toward us. Meeting Emilia's eyes I said "Good. Anderson has already been given breakfast. She'll need more food, clothes, and toilet paper by the end of the day." Alexia finally closed the distance to hold her hand.

Looking at both of them I said "I'll tell the others to start calling you Emilia." Walking away I heard Alexia say "Thanks Z." Lifting a hand to wave an unspoken dismissal.

Heading to Ed they reached his hand out for me to take. Looking up at him I interrupted him before they could ask what happened "I need a distraction, I can't think right now."