Bio Father Saga Journal

October 13, 2026

Have you ever lost a parent and been left with more questions than answers? Or ended up running into more problems than you really should? Well, this is my story about that dilemma.

My biological father passed away and myself, nor my two older siblings were properly notified of his passing. We had to hear it from other random family members instead of his long time live in girlfriend. Not because she was too busy or in mourning, no, but because she didn't want to reach out to us because she hates us so much that she claimed HER daughter was his only living child! The daughter isn't even biologically, nor legally his daughter! He was just with the mother for many years and helped raise HER daughter!

The girlfriend lied to the police, the EMT'S, and the hospital about being his WIFE! The last time our father was married, was to MY mother in the late 80's into the early 90's, he NEVER married the girlfriend! The state they live in also does NOT acknowledge common law marriage, so she can't even claim that legally!

I am 35 and his youngest living child. My oldest sibling is 47. We've got a brother in between us that is 45. We have never had a real relationship, if at all, with our father, but we still are his next of kin and would like the opportunity to actually lay him to rest for our own closure. At least that's how my oldest sibling and I feel about it. We've got other family members who are also in agreement with it being up to us.

I was adopted, and I've got the proof he never wanted me in his life, along with the proof that he was my father, yet the girlfriend had all the control and the last say when it came to anything to do with his bio kids, which makes me wonder if SHE was the one who made him refuse to take custody of me when the state reached out to him before I was legally adopted. She is the reason he couldn't and wouldn't have a relationship with us. She threatened to have myself and my sister arrested if we showed up when I was trying to set up a way to go meet him in 2019. She made him block my number and my social media so I couldn't reach out to him.

My father was far from perfect. He cheated on my mother, he abused her, he did prison time for alleged sexually abuse or rape and kidnapping. So no, I wouldn't say I missed much not growing up with him, but I'd have at least liked to have gotten to know him, to dig into that demented mind for some answers. And my reasoning behind wanting to know him is because my cousin told me once he got sober, he was a great man. I always wondered if it could have been true. I also just wanted to be able to know my family on his side.

As for the truth in regards to his charges and prison time, we will never know that for sure as the last person who knew the truth, took it to her grave when my grandma passed away. None of my uncles seem to know the full truth behind that to this day.

Jr (as we will refer to my bio dad from now on), was a secretive man. He had many women whom he called his wife, he claimed many children that weren't his blood, and he had two faces. The horror stories my mother has told me, the stories from my siblings about their mother's relationships with Jr, the constant confusion of what was true or not, just left me with more and more questions as to who the hell this man was! Questions that I'll never get the real answers to.

We've learned through many people that the girlfriend had multiple life insurance policies recently taken out on Jr before his death. I'm not sure how, as he was basically dying already from cancer and other health issues. The money is all she seems to care about. She doesn't realize we don't want the money, as nice as it would be to compensate us kids for never being there, but that's not why we're getting involved. We don't want his house, as it's roach infested and needs to be condemned. We just want our chance at some closure!

October 14, 2026

The girlfriend had told my cousin that Jr's body had been transported to the funeral home, so of course I had contacted the funeral home to see what info I could get, only to find out he had no idea what I was talking about and he has not picked my bio dad up. The girlfriend just keeps lying about everything. Jr is still in the morgue at the time of me writing this. Which has been confirmed by the morgue as of October 13th 2026, and he passed away October 6th 2026.

On the 13th, the girlfriend decided to call the funeral home FINALLY, but wasn't understanding that nothing can be done, including having him picked up without a down payment. She then proceeded to call one of my uncles crying that the director/owner of the home was rude to her. So my uncle called to get the real story from him. To which we found out she was the one being difficult. The director/owner then called me after talking to them to keep me informed on what was going on. The man was super sweet and I just feel so sorry for him that he's been thrown in the middle.

I haven't told many on that side of the family, but I've put a stop to the girlfriend being able to have a say over Jr's body. Since she wanted to lie and claim to be his wife and her daughter was his only living child, and since she didn't have the audacity to contact Jr's ACTUAL bio children, I decided to be petty and put a stop to her having control.

She is continuing to lie to people, telling them that my sister has already gone and taken Jr's body and had him moved without telling anyone. We haven't even been able to get the process started since we are waiting for a social worker to call us back to make sure we don't do something we're not supposed to and to make sure that the girlfriend can't do other things that aren't within her rights.

This is just part 1 of this crazy saga....I will continue to write and update as this all unfolds until it comes to an end. Stay tuned for more to come!