To All The Femmes Who Have Walked Through Fire,
When I originally developed this list in my early 20s, I had relegated it just to "women," but as the science points to gender and sex as a spectrum, I've figured "femme" would be the most inclusive. These are my personal opinions, and therefore, more like guidelines than actual rules.
The concept of the nuclear family is a relatively new one, but it has taken roots in America in a way that is decidedly opposed to any other relationship dynamic. There has been a recent uptick in acceptance of polyamory, and other "nontraditional" relationship dynamics, which is good to see. However, I have noticed that the topic of friends with benefits is one of those things that most of us has done a time or two, but there really aren't many resources into making those types of arrangements sustainable, or as a replacement for our traditional sense of the relationship paradigm.
We've all been there—in love with someone who doesn't love us back, or not in the same way. There are tons of ways to handle that situation, some destructive, others not so much. This is a list of songs for when your mood is too much to contain, for when you're brimming with desire, and anxiety.
I think about my dad the most when I am driving. When the windows are down and the sun is up and the music is too loud. I think about him driving, and how my driving is very similar to his. I don’t weave in and out of traffic, I rarely speed more than a reasonable amount, and if the car is not a standard my left foot is almost always on the dashboard. I always roll the windows down, and never use the air conditioning. I always have music or an audio book on and I am forever doing something else. It used to be that I was smoking and looking at the map, but these days, in my old age, it has turned to drinking coffee and checking the GPS. Like him, I prefer a standard shift, but I live in a city of remarkable hills, so it is not always practical to do so. I think about him most when I am driving because in my 30 years with him, I spent most of that time in the car. We were always going somewhere. To the store, to the park, to the beach, to family’s houses, friend's houses. My dad was rarely idle, and when he was it was usually because there was traffic on his way to somewhere else.
I have some non-standard practices when it comes to interviewing in general, but particularly when it comes to phone interviews, I get an incredible amount of feedback and almost all of it is incredibly positive, even if the candidate didn’t do well. I have four major components to a phone interview, no matter what the position, which I will lay out for you in this piece along with why I do them, and why they are effective.