As I watch the sun kissed popplers sway in the morning breeze at the campsite, I see families pack up their belongings to head back to their lives. For some, this weekend was an annual vacation. For others, it may have been the last time they'll be together as a family before they tell the kids about the divorce tomorrow. For the couple in the cabin, it may be a last hurrah to see if they still have any remnants of a flame to spark the fire back to life in their relationship. For the family in the green tent this may be their last trip with Grandpa before he's no longer able to get around on his own. For the family in the tan camper, it may be a celebration of Sammy's graduation and their Mom just wanted all the kids together one more time before he leaves for college. And maybe Sarah's in the blue trailer and her husband works on the road so she left the kids with Grandma so she and Dan could have some one-on-one time. Because of life's crazy schedule they haven't been able to find any alone time in awhile and they aren't sure what's left of their marriage.
My husband is a real life superhero. I don't just say that because he works hard and he's a good dad, I say it for many other reasons too.
One of the hardest things a parent will ever have to experience is protecting their child from the other parent. It's heart wrenching because most parents want nothing more than to foster a good, healthy, and even beautiful relationship between their child and the other parent. At least that's always what I wanted. My daughter's father and I separated years ago. I was so set on my daughter having a good relationship with her father that I turned a blind eye to red flags that I shouldn't have. The very last thing I ever wanted was to fight in a courtroom over my own flesh and blood. It seems so heartless and inhumane. So the little things I noticed as unhealthy I tried to excuse with his inexperience as a parent or doing his best based on the fact that he had no structure as a child. My single mom friends always stressed to me how lucky I was that her father even wanted to be in her life, so at times I felt ungrateful for wanting to take away any of the time he wanted to spend with her. But when his behavior turned into borderline psychological abuse I had to step in. He's discipline tactics became erratic and unacceptable. They were humiliating and heartbreaking for our daughter. Not to mention the unhealthy and unlawful lifestyle he was living, so in turn he was subjecting our child to. I finally did what I thought I'd never do. I filed for sole custody. I felt as though I had let my daughter down. Like I was taking away her normalcy. That's when I became the bad guy. That's when the negative talk about Mommy started. I wouldn't defend myself to the things she would come home saying because that would mean telling her the truth of why I did what I did. That would mean crushing the heroic view my little girl had about her dad. That would make my daughter think both of her parents hated each other and placing her smack dab in the middle of our drama. Not gonna happen! So I took the brunt of her anger and confusion and that was okay with me.
As a woman, and more importantly as a mom, I prefer a man with the newly adored “Dad-Bod.” I feel like now a days a lot of moms do and I’m sure it's baffling the hell out of most of the trim and muscular men. Their moment is fading. All their hard work is being outshined by men who have never even stepped foot in a gym and who’s golden brown farmer's tan comes from working in the sun instead of tanning 3 times a week. Muscular men work hard to keep up their physique and they are probably feeling very defeated right about now. I hope they don’t get too down about it though. There are still a lot of woman who like to be tossed around in the throes of passion by a big hunky set of biceps. I'm just not one of them and it seems to be a growing trend. Here’s why (at least in my opinion).