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The Intersection of Forgiveness and Self-Care: Setting Boundaries to Prioritize Your Emotional Health

What It Is and What It Is Not

By Mitchella O ErayomaPublished about a year ago 3 min read
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Forgiveness is a powerful tool that can help us heal from past hurts and move forward with our lives. It is an act of releasing anger, resentment, and bitterness towards someone who has wronged us and freeing ourselves from the emotional burden of holding onto grudges.

However, forgiving someone does not mean we must accept him or her back into our lives. We can forgive someone and still set healthy boundaries to protect ourselves from further harm. Setting boundaries is an essential part of the forgiveness process, and it allows us to maintain our emotional well-being and self-respect.

Setting boundaries means defining what is and is not acceptable behaviour from others. It means communicating our needs, expectations, and limits to others, and enforcing consequences when those boundaries are violated. When we set boundaries, we create a safe and healthy space for ourselves to grow and thrive without being hindered by negative influences.

When we forgive someone and set boundaries, we essentially value ourselves enough to protect our emotional well-being. We are not denying the other person’s humanity or worth but acknowledging that we have the right to choose whom we allow into our lives and how we want to be treated.

For example, let us say you have a friend who constantly belittles and criticizes you. You may forgive them for their hurtful words and actions, but you may also choose to set a boundary by telling them that their behaviour is unacceptable and that you will no longer tolerate it. This may mean limiting your interactions or cutting ties altogether if they refuse to respect your boundaries.

Another example could be forgiving an abusive partner. Forgiving them does not mean you have to stay in the relationship. It is important to acknowledge that their behaviour is not acceptable and that you deserve to be in a relationship where love and safety are present. You can forgive them for their actions, but still set a boundary by ending the relationship and prioritizing your well-being.

It is important to note that setting boundaries does not mean holding onto grudges or seeking revenge. Instead, it is a proactive and positive way to protect ourselves from further harm and to create a healthy and respectful relationship with others.

Forgiveness and setting boundaries can also positively impact the person who has wronged us. By forgiving them, we are allowing them to learn from their mistakes and grow as a person. By setting boundaries, we show them that we value our well-being and ourselves and expect them to respect our boundaries and us if they want to be a part of our lives.

However, it is important to remember that forgiveness and setting boundaries are not easy processes that may take time and effort to achieve. It is normal to feel anger, hurt, and resentment towards someone who has wronged us, and it may take some time to process those emotions and reach a place of forgiveness.

It is also important to seek support from others during this process, whether through therapy, talking to a trusted friend or family member, or joining a support group. By surrounding ourselves with positive and supportive people, we can find the strength and courage to forgive and set healthy boundaries.

In conclusion, forgiveness and healthy boundaries are powerful tools that can help us heal from past hurts and create healthy and respectful relationships with others. By forgiving someone and setting boundaries, we value our emotional well-being and ourselves, creating a safe and healthy space to grow and thrive. It is not always easy, but with time, effort, and support, we can find the strength to let go of the past and move toward a brighter future.

therapysupportselfcarerecoveryhumanitycopingadvice
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About the Creator

Mitchella O Erayoma

Writing helps me better understand myself and my experiences.

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