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Song in the Snow
In D Minor
Burying himself in the snow while holding nothing but a violin. Not stuck or paralyzed, but no desire to move. A few fingers are starting to lose their viability.
Nowhere to go, and no one to hear his cry.
Doesn't even bother to sit up.
Broken.
The bus crash was horrific. He couldn't even bring himself to go back inside the only shelter nearby because of the stench from the rotting flesh.
Left to suffer and wonder why he was the one who got to live. Trying to submerge himself in the snow to lower his chances of making it out.
Survivor's guilt fully kicks in…
He gives up.
An instant death would've been much more merciful than this for him. It was devastating that the music teacher and the rest of his orchestra friends perished, but at least they didn't feel it.
They were relatively good people, so he's sure they're at peace now.
As he thought about the accident and the death of his twin brother that happened long ago, he wailed, "God, please end me already before I do it myself!"
Then, a very missed, familiar face began to subtly appear. What looked like his own reflection was hovering over top of his body. Air playing the violin.
Yet, there is sound.
The ghost speaks with ease, "Play with me.”
He cannot believe his eyes.
With frozen, dying hands, he sits up, and they play one last time as he gradually joins his twin in the afterlife.
About the Creator
Real Poetic
Welcome to my imagination. ✨
I write what I want, whenever I want.
Thanks for reading!
-R.P. ❤️
Instagram: @therealpoetic
Reader insights
Nice work
Very well written. Keep up the good work!
Top insight
Excellent storytelling
Original narrative & well developed characters
Comments (9)
Nice work on this.
So powerfully emotional! Very well written!
Woah! This was so sad and so well-written. Haunting and heartbreaking. Beautifully done. 💗
Gosh, that was just so sad! But at least he's now free of his survivors guilt and renuited with his twin brother. I'd like to think that that's definitely a happier place for him. Loved your story so much!
Amy Irving's character sue in "Carrie". What a burden to be left to carry. Not as terrible as "Sophie's Choice", but still....
This is what I'm talking about. The depth of emotion you created is really effective. I felt I was there with him through the suffering. Great Job! Editorial note: In the 3rd sentence, consider changing the word 'it's' to 'their' since you are talking about multiple fingers. I'm only mentioning it since I want this story to have a deserving chance. It's a great micro!
What an epic story! Phenomenal writing! Would love 2 see this on Broadway or Netflix! BRAVO! You're so talented RP!
I love this illustration of what is clearly a Leonard Cohen tune... Seriously, I really love this (my Canadian heart gets it)!
Tragic ending!!! Left a heart!!!♥️♥️💕