Dopey's Tale
For L.C. Schäfer's Fairy Tale Challenge
“I tell ya, wasn’t right how he defiled her. She was pure as…” the dwarf said, slamming his mug down atop the dingy inn counter. “How I hope she still sleeps soundly, and he buggers off to his castle.”
The hooded barman set down a fresh pint of ale, listening intently to the tale, but it was nearly time to shutter up.
“A bite, dwarf? Seems like you’ve been through the wringer. We got mutton, stew, apples–might even have a spot of cheese,” the barman said kindly.
“For hck Grumpy and Doc!” the dwarf mumbled. “Should’ve gone with them…should’ve gone…” The dwarf hung his head low.
“Were they Friends?” the barman asked, cleaning a flagon.
“Family. When hck we found what he did, they hck grabbed their picks, and hck marched right off after the bastard.”
“And then?”
“Never saw ‘em again. Us other dwarves? Cowards, I tell ya!”
The barman prepped two flagons, “Don’t be so hard on yourself, dwarf.”
“We’re hck cowards. Could’a turned him in…”
“What did you say your name was again?”
‘Hck Dopey.”
“Here, Dopey, this’s on me. It’s a wonderfully special brew,” the barman said. Another flagon of ale appeared, its tan head bubbling like a caldron.
Dopey drank deeply, his bloodshot eyes snapping wide, “Gods above, what delicacy is this!”
“Castle-brewed ale, the finest in all the forest. May we toast your companions? I'd like to know these heroes.”
“Ay, a fine idea. To Sneezy, Happy, Bashful, and Sleepy! Wherever ye may be! I hope you’re all sleeping safe and sound,” Dopey yelled with drunken bravado to the empty inn.
The barman smiled beneath his hood.
Silence followed.
“Well, bed calls. Thank you, friend. Didn’t catch your name,” Dopey said.
“Never been one for names. Here, for your troubles,” the barman said, tossing a parting gift to the dwarf. Despite his drunkenness, Dopey deftly caught the ripe red apple.
“A real prince charming, you are. Goodnight!” Dopey said, taking a bite and disappearing into the night.
Now alone, the barman lowered his red hood and ran his tired hand through his strong, black locks.
Oh dwarf, they would all slept soundly, had only you kept your drunken mouth shut.
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A/N:
A retelling/continuation written for Fucked Up Fairytales - An Unofficial Challenge by L.C. Schäfer. Word Count: 366. Details below:
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About the Creator
Matthew Fromm
Full-time nerd, history enthusiast, and proprietor of random knowledge. The best way to find your perfect story is to write it yourself.
Here there be dragons, and knights, and castles, and quests for entities not wishing to be found.
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Comments (10)
Great job congratulations
Damn fine tale you wrote. it hit all the points and was delightfully entertaining.
That's why his name is Dopey! But your story is dope! (in a good way)
Sheesh! Well that's one way the story could've gone.. no 'happily ever after' out here 🤣. Great twist Matthew 👏🏽👏🏽
Wow! What a plot twist and take on the story! Talk about a messed up fairytale. Super well done!
Goodness, it reads like Dopey's having survivor's guilt and that the story of Snow White pertains to rape culture. Makes sense why the dwarves wouldn't win such a fight. The castle prince is a tall man with years of combat experience. Sure, the dwarves know how to swing a pick-axe, but not at a moving opponent, even when riding forest critters such as deer and goats. Sounds like they're just trying to bring Prince Charming to justice. Though he may have slayed the evil Witch that transformed into a dragon, the real monster seemed like it was him not asking for consent and still continuing doing what he wanted. Kind of reminds me of the beginning of Shrek when the mirror was showing Sniw White as a Bachelorette. "She may live with seven other men, but this beauty doesn't sleep around, cause she's in a coma!"
Hahahahahahha Dopey doing was he does best 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Loved your plot twist!
'Might even have a spot of cheese' Not sure why but that line made me laugh. Once again, the language was spot on. And I loved the twist!
Dark twist on a classic tale. Great job as always Matthew!!!
Oh no! What's going to happen to them 😮😮😮😮😮