Beyond Burntout

The Breaking Point

I can't help but reflect on the whirlwind of events that led me to this moment. The past few months and years have been a blur—a haze of exhaustion, stress, and overwhelming emotions. I've been running on autopilot for far too long, pushing myself beyond my limits, all while neglecting the warning signs that my body and mind were desperately trying to send me.

Personal Turmoil

It all started with a job that I never truly enjoyed. Day in and day out, I found myself trudging through the motions, feeling increasingly disconnected from my work and the people I was doing it with. My managers didn't respect or treat me well. I felt like just another cog in the machine, expendable and unappreciated.

"That's corporate for ya..." as they all say.

Oh, how foolish of me not to listen.

Meanwhile, my personal life was far from smooth sailing. Unfortunate events at home only added to the mounting pressure. Before I knew it, my mental health began to deteriorate. I was drowning in a sea of responsibilities and expectations and didn't know how to swim to the surface. One moment, your responsibility is looking after yourself, but then, another moment, you are made to look after multiple lives.

I was burning the candle at both ends, never taking a break, and constantly overloading myself with tasks and commitments. I ignored the signs of burnout, brushing off my lack of motivation, disinterest in activities I once loved, and inability to focus or concentrate. I was living in a fog, feeling numb and detached from the world around me.

The Wake-up Call

It wasn't until I stumbled upon a book called "Burn Out to Brilliant" by Dr. Marny Lishman that I realised how deep I had sunk. The book's poignant words struck a chord within me:

"Burnout is what happens when you try to avoid being human for too long." - Michael Gungor.

I avoided my humanity, burying myself in work and obligations, hoping that everything would eventually fall into place if I kept pushing. That's the right thing to do... isn't it? I felt so weak even thinking about "taking a break." I felt the world would crumble and falter if I stepped back and worked on myself. I kept telling myself that I didn't deserve to feel overwhelmed because there were people out there doing worse than me... the gaslighting was real.

Instead, I found myself teetering on the edge of collapse, my mind and body screaming for mercy. Countless sleepless nights, a drop in productivity at work and eventually the feeling of wanting to give it all up for "nothing."

I knew I had to make a change, and fast.

Choosing a New Path

And so, I decided to take a career break—a chance to step back, breathe, and recalibrate. It was a leap of faith, but I knew it was necessary for my well-being. During my time off, I focused on rejuvenating and re-energising myself, rediscovering what brought me joy and fulfilment outside of work.

Slowly but surely, I began to reclaim balance in my life. I am only one month into my career break, but it has been the best experience ever.

I prioritised self-care, set boundaries, and learned to say no when necessary. I reconnected with friends and family, reignited old hobbies, and embraced new experiences with open arms. Most importantly, I learned to listen to my body and honour its needs, whether taking a nap when I was tired or going for a walk to clear my mind.

It hasn't been easy, and there have been setbacks. But with each passing day, I feel myself inching closer to a state of equilibrium—a place where work and life coexist harmoniously, where I can thrive personally and professionally.

The Journey Continues

My journey from burnout to balance is still a work in progress, but I am grateful for how far I have come. I may not have all the answers, but I am moving in the right direction, one step at a time. As I continue on this path of self-discovery and growth, I am reminded that the most important journey is the one within.

So here's to embracing our humanity, honouring our needs, and finding balance in an increasingly chaotic world. May we all strive to live authentically, passionately, and unapologetically, one day at a time.

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Thank you for reading!