The Swamp logo

Go West America

Why Kanye May Be THE Answer

No, but seriously. Have we really thought about this? First off, people often forget that the lesser of two evils is still evil, but no one talks about three evils, so we should all be good to go here:

Make America Stronger Better Faster, Harder; you would have to be a Daft Punk to not realize the value of these lyrics, and obviously, the very theme of Kanye's life. He never stops at anything to get what he is after, even in the face of serious doubt or panic, we could always look to Yeezus.

He may or may not have shown some presidential qualities when he believed in himself and his values so hard, he made a teeny boo boo with Ms. Swift in an award show. But, hey, he is on a presidential ballot now, is he not? What a great recovery and transition for him. He made amends and found a way to connect with someone he finally considers to be greater than him. He wants you to find that higher power too.

His obvious ability to adapt shows his intelligence, and commitment to remaining great. He is a beautiful person of color, open about his mental struggles and life difficulties along his path to success. This seems a lot more honest than anything we are seeing in this election season. Also, Kim, with her grace and poise, would NEVER allow a fly to perch on Ye's head. Never ever. I personally am comforted by this fact.

We, as a nation, can be sure of the Wests trajectory. We can also be sure that with Kim, and the entire Kardashian-Jenner business savvy, financially, with Ye, would be in good hands. With less to worry about financially, our country might even be able to become a more healthy, beautiful place.

Medicare would be able to start paying for Sonobello and plastics, which would give this country the literal facelift it so desperately deserves. We could drop some dead weight and get healthy. Plus, if Medicare did this, depression levels would drop, health rates would increase and everyone would spend so much less time being unhappy, overall.

This too would put a serious decrease in some of this nation’s biggest expenditures: mental health treatments and medical care subsequent to mental health and weigh issues.

Boasting a former Olympian as part of his family and advisors, we can also be fairly sure that Americans would become much more physically active and health conscious under such guidance.

Many kinds of social crime rates would drop, such as rape. It would become nonexistent- everyone would be in shapewear. No one can take that off, even if they wanted to. If someone was stupid enough to attempt such an assault, the removal of said shapewear would definitely give people a chance to stab their attacker in the eye with some spiked heels- everyone would get them for Christmas along with a year’s supply of shapewear, thanks to the first family and their generosity.

Our society would become one where everyone would know that it is not only okay, but super great to be who you are, and that no matter where you came from, you too can become great, beautiful, successful and even change genders. No one could mess with those facts ever again with such a diverse and inclusive first (extended) family.

The West White House would be poppin', with such a stylish and contemporary first family, there is no denying that. We have witnessed Kanye make important decisions, change his opinion when presented with different information, and even become religious. This means we know he is real. He is like us, and it hits all the demographics. I do not know why no one has been pointing this perspective out yet.

The guy has some serious guts, and a great support team backing him. When he needs advice, he recognizes that, and seeks it from some of the smartest, wealthiest, and diverse sources to draw on.

Seriously, America, why haven't we gotten behind this man’s presidential bid?! Kanye is, and represents everything we all love.

Kanye, this is your shot. Go for it, man!

celebrities
Jessica Gushwa
Jessica Gushwa
Read next: New Mexico—It's like a State, like All the Others!
Jessica Gushwa
See all posts by Jessica Gushwa

Find us on socal media

Miscellaneous links