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To All the Men I loved before.

Day 18

By Kerri MiLLsPublished 3 years ago 3 min read
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https://www.thewowstyle.com/33-beautiful-sunrise-and-sunset-pictures/

To all the men I loved before...

To All The Girls I've Loved Before- Willie Nelson, Julio Iglesias

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAmrCiwNq-Y&ab_channel=AndyAnders

*****Listen to Youtube Video*****

Where to start. Things are going well for me now. I'm doing good. Thanks for asking. To you, you changed me, I changed me. I'm not the same person you once knew. Either is he. He's different. He changed. Change is good. Change is good I'm starting to realize that. I like the change.

I'm changing. I'm changing every day. I like the person I am now. I like the new me. I like not gambling, I'll tell ya that much. I feel like a new person, a new me. I like the new me. Change is good. Change is good.

Day 18.

Who would have thought I could make it this far. I know it doesn't seem far, eighteen days, but I feel it. Something changed. I was beginning to give up on myself. I thought I hit rock bottom time and time again. I always went back. I went back to the machines, the races, scratch tickets, whatever I felt like doing that day. They had a hold on me, the machines. How could I have been that way for so long. How I could have lived that way? I don't understand.

I will never go back to that way of life. I am Day 18 Strong. I feel strong. I feel empowered. I feel like how I did when I quit drinking, but stronger. I can't believe I lived that way for so long. I allowed gambling to have such a hold over me for so long. Such a Control. I like this new way of life better. I feel happier. I feel stronger, more confident. I feel like myself.

For a long time, I thought I didn't know who I was. I couldn't remember who I was. I couldn't feel myself inside of me. I feel like I know who I am now like I was always here. I know who I am. I was lost for so long. I'm just starting to get to know who I am again. I like who I am. I like who I am more and more each day. I feel strong. I feel confident.

*****The Ultimate gift*****

The gift I am asking everyone to give to themselves or someone else this year is a break. Give yourself or someone you know and love a break. I have been giving myself a break since I got laid off from my job is March 2020. I worked briefly in the summer and then I quit that new job. I needed more of a break. I wasn't finished yet. I was starting to break down...yet again. I needed something I never knew I needed. I needed a break.

I needed a long break. Not just a week, or a month, I needed however long it would take. I gave myself a break, an open time-framed break. I was not to pick up and get another job out of loneliness or boredom. I was not to try and solve my world of problems in one day. I was to take a break. I had rules to this break.

I am enjoying my break. I feel like I have never been able to sit back and relax and enjoy my life, or at least I haven't been able to in a while. I never knew how. I feel good. So for my Ultimate Christmas Gift, I challenge you to give yourself or a loved one a break. Sit back and relax and do it tomorrow. Have a glass of wine. Take a break. If you know someone with little children and have some spare time on your hands offer to take the kids for a couple of hours or maybe a night!

Give yourself a break this Christmas. If you can't afford everything you want, it's Ok. Bills coming up, it's Ok. You'll get through this. Christmas is about love. You'll figure it out. Take a break. Take a break from stress and worry. Take a break for yourself. Give yourself a BREAK! My Ultimate Gift Guide is to guide yourself or someone you love to a well-deserved break. We all need it. Christmas can be stressful. Give yourself a break!

Merry Christmas!:)

recovery
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About the Creator

Kerri MiLLs

*Love thyself*

#CapeBretonrProud

“Ooo baby, baby it’s a wild world” ❤️😉

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