Build a reality according to your convenience by changing your way of thinking

At certain periods of life an individual may experience a weariness with respect to the physical reality he or she is living. The key to radically change a negative reality is to change the thoughts that govern one's mentality. The reality experienced by each individual is a simulation created by the brain according to the predominant thoughts and mental habits. The truth is that no one interacts with external reality, but experiences his own reality configured by his brain.

Human beings have thoughts that do not correspond to the reality of the moment or the situation: these thoughts are called distorted or irrational thoughts. They are ideas that come to mind and prevent us from seeing the ultimate reality of things. This pattern of thinking leads to error, and that influences to a great extent and directly on the individual emotional state.

It is the interpretations of reality that lead to being emotionally stable or unstable individuals, rather than reality itself.

Changing the thinking pattern

Psychology bases part of its therapies on the substitution of irrational thoughts for others that are better adjusted to the real facts. Learning how to transform irrational thoughts into rational thoughts is the backbone of reality-adjusted thinking. People who are able to modify these thoughts can have great control over their emotions and be able to make better decisions.

One of the most commonly used techniques in clinical psychology to change maladjusted thoughts is debating. This method teaches the patient to modify his beliefs through questions formulated by rational parameters, until he is able to generate a much more adaptive alternative thinking. The objective is that at the end the patient will be able to substitute or to file his thoughts in an autonomous way. Even if the circumstances are complex, such as a dismissal or a divorce, they will not change if the way of thinking is not changed.

A healthy and rational way of thinking

Emotional and behavioral problems are not caused by events, but are caused by the beliefs that underlie the interpretations of these problems. One of the basic aspects to highlight is the distinction between rational beliefs and irrational beliefs.

To think rationally is to think relativistically, expressing oneself in terms of desires and tastes. When an individual thinks in a healthy way, even when he or she does not get what he or she wants, the negative feelings that these situations generate do not prevent the achievement of new goals or purposes.

On the contrary, dogmatic and absolutist thinking about reality manifests itself in terms of obligation, need or demand. Its non-achievement provokes inappropriate negative emotions that interfere in the achievement of goals. In addition, behavioral disturbances such as isolation, avoidance or escape behavior and substance abuse are generated.

In many difficult situations, the correct behavior involves intervening thoughts rather than changing the external reality.

A positive and definitive change

Although it is true that the way we process reality directly affects our thinking and emotions, not everyone benefits from rational emotive therapy, such as that of Albert Ellis, a talented American cognitive psychotherapist. If you find yourself at a time in your life when your reality is out of control, the best thing you can do is to go to a professional psychologist to apply the psychotherapeutic technique that best suits your problem and your coping styles.

Any psychotherapeutic technique leads you to recognize the bad decisions you make regarding your problems and then you discover your own mechanisms to solve them. The most important thing is that you realize that the reality you experience depends on you and not so much on external circumstances.