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Beginning and Beginning and Beginning.

“Life is not measured by the breaths you take— but by the moments that take your breath away.”

By Samuel OlukayodePublished 3 years ago 5 min read
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Nothing is as sad as when something ends. Yet there isn't a single thing I cherish more. Because whenever something is over, it means something new is afoot. And that something can be immensely exciting. Creating is that for me. I express myself through so many different mediums and within each, I find another reason to love living. The first time I really drew something, I rushed to show my father and he just sort of looked at it (He was cooking). Then he comments: "Why his feet so damn big?". It was a character named Riku, from a franchise called Kingdom Hearts.

I was in 7th grade at the time and from then till now I’ve been drawing. So much so, I had a teacher in high school, who’s desk I’d approach as soon as I entered his class, where I was to place my sketchbook before the period started. What’s good Vokalek? To this day, you’d be hard pressed to find me without my iPad (which I am conveniently typing on) or a pocket-ish sized doodle pad. I just love it. Finishing a piece is an adventure in and of itself. The one that comes after is just the same, but it’s different in the way that what preceded it, entices one to capture more of whatever majesty they managed before. Art is surely the greatest tool we have for reaching and understanding one another.

Aside, from the visual arts, I thrive on the ever mind boggling nature of the pugilist. To be specific— boxing. In truth my art came to something of a screeching halt because of it in November. I’m slowly getting back to it as of late though. Bruce Lee was someone who truly understood the serenity of fostering your mind, body and spirit as a fighter. He actually developed his footwork studying Muhammad Ali. I think his story is one of the most interesting tales of what we consider to be that of a legend.

Fighting is where the philosophy of life and its meanings twister about my conscious, but it’s also the place I find the most peace. Being able to move in such a precise and swift way is true therapy. There’s an innate sense of awareness that fills me. One in which I’m hyper aware of all the different parts that make my body what it is. Every extremity is breathing and breathless.

I’ve been enticed by the martial arts since young, but was significantly stunted in stature next to my peers. Then there was my host of allergies and highly accute asthma. Sadly I’ve never gotten the chance to compete and my clock for a future as a pro fighter is ticking with imminence. My trainer sees my motivation though and believes I can still get there within a couple years. I’ve only been training since November, but in that time I’ve stopped taking all my medications and for the first time in my life, I enjoy running. The endurance I have completely thrills me and I’m only just beginning.

Truthfully and above all else, music is my life blood. I don’t know how to be without it. In the way boxing halted my art, music did the same only several was years ago. Words mean a lot to me and I pride myself on never having written an empty one. I’ve been told I take forever to text and that’s only because I’m being thoughtful of the intention in my diction. I want the things I say and write to be fully felt and rarely— if ever—misconstrued into something false (Sigh, they absolutely have been).

Music is how I share all the parts that make me, who I am. For a long time now, the circumstances and unprecedented downs of life have made it difficult to really get myself heard. However the current flux of things sees me standing more alone, which is where I think I need to flourish fully in that aspect. I’m glad for the roadblocks. I only become better with each one and all the time spent not able to create as freely and unburdened by a multitude of stresses, has primed me to make even more evocative art.

I grow the most in my songs. I’m able to recognize the flaws in my spirit and salvage the parts that have been broken. Creating something even sturdier and aware of itself. Something that promises not to break again. I’ve always trusted whatever words and emotions push my pen and I’ve always found myself in the throes of catharsis immediately after.

All I truly want is to benefit as many people as possible with the things I make. I have a plethora of dreams swimming in the depths and shallows of me and the largest one of all, is finding a way to provide those feelings my creative ability lends me to every person I can. I want to make a better world for people and I want to make peoples worlds better. Creating is important for humanity. We’re all creations and that is something that goes overlooked.

Why would anyone read what I write, care what draw, listen to what I sing or follow my endeavors like their favorite touring band? No clue. Trying to “sell” my passions feels degrading. I just want to put them into the world and maybe it’ll put something back into me. Either way I’ll never stop. The only remedy for the bitterness of ending is to begin again. So I’ll consider my life a menagerie of never ending blank canvases. Ever word the outline. Every punch a brush stroke. Every song a color swatch. And every year another moving masterpiece.

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About the Creator

Samuel Olukayode

"Never pretend to a love which you do not actually feel, for love is not ours to command." — Alan Watts

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