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The Attitude That Slowly Destroys the Good Things in Your Relationships

by Sarfaraz Ali 2 months ago in Relationships
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Including the love, romance, and happiness in your relationship

The Attitude That Slowly Destroys the Good Things in Your Relationships
Photo by Everton Vila on Unsplash

A healthy, long-lasting, and committed relationship isn't a wish come true; it is the outcome of the good behaviors and attitude of the partners involved.

Preston Kanak knows this too:

"...without developing and keeping a positive attitude, it will be very difficult to get consistent and long-lasting success."

He said the truth.

You create the future of your relationship... by your attitude; starting from your expectations and then your actions. They are the greatest influence on your relationship.

When you start to think that it is your partner's obligation to pay the bills when you eat out, get you a gift on your birthday, send you pocket money, make your coffee every morning, wake you up every morning with a paragraph, call every afternoon to check on you,... And when he doesn't do it, you get angry with them. Then, you have allowed a sense of entitlement into your heart.

From there, it will release its toxin into your relationship. It will ruin every single thing that once made your relationship loving, healthy, and a good place to be.

It comes not but to steal the love, kill the trust and destroy all that you have built with your partner.

That's its only mission.

Don't give it a place.


It starts with your mind:

Realize that nobody owes you anything. Including your partner. A relationship is not the same thing as running a charity home. It is two people coming together to share in the pleasant experience in each other's lives and build an institution called family.

If in the process, one gets generous with his time and resources more than the other, it should not be seen as an obligation, but as an act of love and affection.

Here’s where your action comes in:

Having realized this truth, greet every act of generosity with expressed gratitude. Including the little things: opening a door for you, helping you with your bag or buggy, knotting your tie as you get ready for the office, making you a meal...

Say thank you.

Ice it with a smile.

Thank them in such a way that they know you recognize it wasn't an obligation on their part, but an act of kindness from their heart.

A sense of entitlement slowly destroys the good things in your relationship.

But letting your partner know you're grateful for their little acts of kindness are some of the little hinges in relationships that swing the doors of bigger and better experiences.

You will end well in your love life, Amen.


It is easy to stay in relationships that are not helpful or positive. We often think that the relationship is good because it has lasted this long. However, if you want to experience a healthy and meaningful relationship, you should change your attitude. What are some of the attitudes that make your relationship dysfunctional?

It is easy to be frustrated by someone who does not seem to understand the meaning of love, but when you begin to lose interest in your partner, it is difficult to see that it's not their fault. It is important to know what you are doing and realize that sometimes people will never change.

People often ask, "Why are relationships so hard?" and the answer is that it has nothing to do with love. The truth is that people are too busy trying to prove themselves in their relationships and control the outcome. Sometimes, this attitude can lead to a downward spiral where the person wants their partner to change but the other person doesn't want to change.


About the author

Sarfaraz Ali

A Psychologist, Writer, Animal advocate and Human Rights activist. My blog is about finding the balance in life and encouraging others to be their best selves.

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