Stitching it together

Stitching it together

Sewing has been my constant companion.

I have been sewing since Was eight years old, which now makes it fifty years! As a kid, I spent all my summers off from school visiting my paternal Grandmother in College Point, Queens, New York, which we used to refer to as “the city” because it was so much more alive and bustling than our quiet suburban neighborhood on Long Island.

Grandma A. was the first person who taught me how to sew. There were quilts and patches, and always mending to be done, all by hand. As she got older and her eyesight got worse, she would let me thread needles for her, then I’d weave the thread back and forth through a long strip of scrap fabric with gigantic stitches which I now know are called basting stitches. Later when I wasn’t around she would be able to just pull the needle with the length of thread out of the cloth and sew what ever she needed.

After eight years of primary Catholic school, my two older sisters and I started to attend public school, and for the very first time we were offered art and crafting classes. I immediately signed up for bread-making, ceramics and of course sewing! Coming from an artistic family, where my father was an aerospace draftsman, and my mother had received a scholarship to Pratt for fashion drawing, I knew I had an interest in crafting and working with my hands. At school, I first learned how to use a sewing machine and made clothes from “Simplicity” patterns, which in the 70’s were pretty tacky by today’s standards: wide lapels, stripes and bell bottoms were all the rage. I made a nightgown with lace cuffs, and a pair of white overalls with my name embroidered across the bib pocket, for extra credit.

My sisters were pretty much hippies, and we patched our jeans with-in a inch of their lives, with colorful, contrasting fabrics. (Think or Google “Jimmy Page.”) We also dabbled in embroidery, experimenting with every kind of stitching we had read up on.

I also sew because I was always so short (5’3” on a good day), and usually ended up modifying a lot of my clothing, to fit my body or my taste.

As the years went on, I came out as transgender, and at the age of 39, began transitioning, requiring new kinds of modifications of my clothing style from female to male. I still loved sewing. Transitioning doesn’t change who you are, or your interests.

I continued to build on my skills. Being mostly self taught, I never thought of myself as an expert. I certainly didn’t think of myself as a tailor, but still as more of a seamstress. Even though “seamstress” sounds like a pretty gender specific title, I have always loved the sound of it, and just related to it more. It’s not like I was altering men’s suits, or creating full garments from scratch. I was simply sewing seams.

Until… I actually got hired as a tailor in a well established Leather shop in NYC. There we made a lot of custom garments as well as many rush jobs for Broadway shows, pop stars, and for TV and movie props. I loved the work. This is when I started using an industrial, (walking foot,) sewing machine. They are real work horses; they need to be able to sew through several layers of cow hide!

I designed many new products while I was at the Leather Shop: from leather wine bottle holders, to a leather apron for hair stylist, to a harness for a big old bulldog. That was an and interesting fitting. He was pretty squirmy, and kept wanting to play. But I really enjoyed specializing in making the leather kilts. They were pretty complex, with six pleats on each side, a back pocket, rolled waist band, two buckles and four snaps!

This is also where I learned how invaluable a tailor’s sharp scissors are, and how they are an extension of a sewer’s hand. Growing up with two artistic sisters, we shared many art supplies, and I always had to make due with whatever multi-craft scissors we had laying around the house, but now when I find a good pair, I can be protective of the tools from which I make my livelihood. I have laid into more than one romantic partner, because they innocently used my pair of sewing shears to cut something that wasn’t fabric. I’ve heard of others who have resorted to using a small padlock to lock their scissor handles together. Who knows? This might have saved a marriage or two!

In my case, the problem I had is that I am very left handed. Only 11% of the world is left hand dominant, so after years of struggling, I was thrilled when I found out that left-handed scissors existed. Now I have four pairs made by Fiskars that I couldn’t live without.

From co-workers to romantic relationships, now I never have to worry about other people using my scissors. When they pick up the molded handle of my ‘lefty’ scissors and try to use them, they get the same weird feeling I have had all my life from using scissors that feel somehow warped or bent in the wrong direction. (Not to mention that they would leave deep indentation marks on different parts of my hand.) I remember when I first tried a pair of “lefty” scissors. It was like sliding my hand into a perfectly made, custom glove, instead of feeling like I was trying to force a wrong shoe on the opposite foot, that is two sizes too small!

Now, at the time of this writing, I am the proud owner of three sewing machines. One is a foot treadle, (a replica of an oldie I got when I was in my 20’s, when I really could not afford it, but it’s heavy cast iron and I still use it today.) Then there are the two electric ones that I found left on curbs on trash day in NYC, which obviously have paid for them selves (ha ha)…but seriously, they helped me pay my rent from time to time.

Just before I got l laid off from my tailoring job, I had started attending an Inter-Faith Seminary where I became an ordained Minister. Then more recently, I became a fully processed sister through the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, a world wide (non profit) order of queers nuns.

When ever I was between jobs, or just for extra money, my resourcefulness would kick in…I made minister stoles and sold them at my seminary. I also made pillows and fancy obscure pot holders, which friends were kind enough to sell in their stores in upstate New York, where they were featured in a “must haves” holiday edition magazine in Ulster county. I’ve done many side jobs for friends as well: repairs on antique bags and needle point pieces; curtains and table runners for trade shows; custom slip covers; and even a knock-off of a famous artist’s fiber art, wall-hanging of layered silk and taffeta.

So you see, sewing has been a very good companion to me, challenging me to up my game through tough times, and giving me a life-long enjoyable and profitable skill. I’m happy to carry on the tradition of my grandmother. And now my niece is proving to be very crafty, and recently has taken up embroidery, which makes me very happy.

-Rev. Kyle Applegate