instant is a forecast promising no umbrellas, but clouds are known
for never holding, anything back,
so your socks get soaked in a word
with an empty meaning
Instant coffee means waiting on water
brought to a boil,
means two tablespoons,
one for sugar, one for powder,
then the stir,
minutes pass from one instance
to the next
instant rice calls five minutes microwave
time, the butter must melt
the rice must cool
so you don’t burn your empty stomach
both instances
are puddles
on
paper sunshine smiles
they say we can be gone
in an instant
yet it takes us years
to get there
they say back in a flash
back in a jiffy
be right back
but even if the second point
is the beginning and the end
there is still distance
connecting the two,
there’s still space
between seconds
no matter how small
I am tiny
I am fucking insignificant
I am begging for purpose
I am begging for my next breath
to mean something other
than a sigh of continuence,
you are tall, so fucking tall
I want to sit on your shoulders
stretch me out on the ground
make me ten feet high
place me on your shoulders
so I can give eskimo kisses
to the smiling sun and cool down
the way august burns the bottom
of children’s feet during the last week
before pools close and books open
I am a man trying to figure out
what the fuck being a man means
in 2019 tell me I’m not a job title
tell me I’m not a car brand
tell me it’s okay to fucking cry
in public places because I wake up
every day with a forecast calling
for sunshine and I need the umbrella
I forgot by my empty coffee cup
tell me I’m not a paycheck
because I bleed overdraft receipts
&
the bank tries to repossess what’s left
of my soul, I can no longer find what I’m losing, I can no longer hide what isn’t found
when you look at me, see me,
when you look at me, wink,
do anything but blink
twice because nothing is ever gone
in an instant, but every beginning and ending is a distance between two points
&
even seconds have spaces between them
I’m so tiny
I’m so insignificant
I feel like I will be lost
somewhere between boiling water
&
liquid powder
so whatever you do
please
don’t
blink
twice
