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Tunnel Vision

Acrostic Distraction

By KJ AartilaPublished 10 months ago Updated 10 months ago 1 min read
13
Tunnel Vision
Photo by Barari Cătălin on Unsplash

Damp and dark inside the walls:

I lay on the dirt bed you made for me, when I dared

Shift my eyes away from you for a moment

Toward shinier things, toward the lighted

Rainbow -

And with the sadistic speed of the monster I loved, you

Covered me deep in soil

To restrict my vision -

I see now

Only your dancing with the

Nocturnal shadows within my narrowed view.

sad poetryheartbreak
13

About the Creator

KJ Aartila

A writer of words in northern WI with a small family and a large menagerie.

My Substack

Reader insights

Nice work

Very well written. Keep up the good work!

Top insights

  1. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

  2. On-point and relevant

    Writing reflected the title & theme

  3. Expert insights and opinions

    Arguments were carefully researched and presented

  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  3. Masterful proofreading

    Zero grammar & spelling mistakes

  4. Eye opening

    Niche topic & fresh perspectives

  5. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

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Comments (11)

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  • Rob Angeli9 months ago

    Really great, I didn't realize it was an acrostic at all until I read the previous comment. Expert take on the buried alive theme. Poe would love it!

  • Paul Stewart10 months ago

    This is stunning, Keila. Dark, heartbreaking, but incredibly well-written. Some beautiful word and phrase choices and it is just the right length and has the right pace. I also felt distracted from it being an acrostic because I was so engrossed by your words! Loved it!

  • Meagan Dion10 months ago

    Very well written!

  • Buried alive!

  • marie e ehlenbach10 months ago

    It was good!

  • Gina C.10 months ago

    Gorgeous, Keila! I really admire your structure here 😍 Your words are beautiful and this is sooo compelling 🥹

  • MARIE ODEMS 10 months ago

    KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK💜

  • Heather Hubler10 months ago

    Oh wow, that was dark and so beautifully penned. What a great entry, Keila!

  • Great take on the challenge and a superb image

  • Like a shining awareness of death this poem is

  • Margaret Brennan10 months ago

    It's so beautiful and yet sad. Makes me think back to the days of my first unhappy moment. Thank you for sharing.

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