Thoughts from my body

Thoughts from my body

White white white

red red red

This time two weeks ago,

I did leaps and pirouettes in my living room

in my Pro Barre ballet class

and the whole world seemed in front of me,

on the Eve of Christmas.

Now I feel tainted, marred

though I did nothing to invite sin;

because of someone else's stain

I am spiraling down Alice's narrow rabbit-hole

tumbling down day and night

in this abyss of darkness -- a coagulation of thick black mess.

Each day I wait for the morn --

it seems just within my fragile grasp --

yet it slips away from me again, elusive and liquefied.

I am left hoping for another day.