Things love has taught me

I've always been stubborn

no hill was too small to die on

and accepting an apology always felt like betraying myself because the damage was already done

but that left me sad and isolated

because I held people so tightly to their words the first time

and I was even more strict on myself

I too was not allowed to change my mind

Doomed to a life of stagnation

Wearing a persona far outgrown

Hurting myself and those I loved with my rigidity

those edges I sharpened daily to keep lines clear

So one day I decided to leave

to reinvent myself in a place no one knew me

And I did, and it made me happy

until I outgrew her too

and the pain of shoving myself inside a mold once again outgrown

it became too much, so I left again

to rediscover who I was becoming

to do so alone so I could emerge a whole new woman with lines defined

But as time passed I realized that I am in a constant state of metamorphosis

So I kept to myself more and more

because growth is messy

growth is painful

but its also magical and beautiful

And love taught me how good it feels to share that

love taught me how incredible it feels to participate in growth with another

To melt down the harsh lines between you and I

to marinate in us soup

not caring who is w and who is e

just that we are we

Love has taught me that there is just as much comfort in being held as you break down as there is vulnerability and fear

and that there is just as much pleasure in allowing someone to help you piece yourself back together in a new way as there is confusion and embarrassment

Love has taught me so many things and I am sure it will teach me many more