The Snake Within

My mother has always told me

To work hard and accomplish my dreams

Get a job and keep up my grades

We can never understand her feelings about working every day

But is it really us who can’t understand

She’s been through a lot, yes

Working 7 days a week to support us

Stressed to no belief

Yes

We get that, if anything it’s a fact

We strive every day to make her proud

Proud of the kids she worked her ass off for

We see everything

How rugged she is

Both mentally, physically, and emotionally

All of our achievements, good grades, and our jobs

All to make up for all of her pain

But is right for us to be treated like we don’t

Being yelled at for getting a B- or just a simple B

Being told I’m not applying myself enough

Being told that I’m not responsible enough

I have a job I go to college

Juggling going to school and going to my job

My grades and money

The two things I was told to do

All of a sudden isn’t good enough!

Mama can’t you see it isn’t me that can’t see

But you who can’t see the real me

All of my pain, my tears

The emotional damage the darkness in my soul

Mama can’t you see I can’t breath

Every day is challenging both physically and mentally

Holding my head up every day

Afraid of draining in my dreams

Being Swallowed up by your hurtful words

Spite back out into a bottomless sea

Mama can’t you see I can’t breath

I wake up every day ready for school come back home late

Having you breathe down my neck about where I’ve been

Why was I there

And I can no longer do that

I walked to the world being shot at with these responsibilities

Coming home drenched in blood

Wounds I try so hard to hide

As my mother, I want to see her smile

My endless effort doesn’t succeed

Only receiving a hand full of salt

Placing all over my wounds and expected to man up

Mama can’t you see I can’t breath

Days I take to my own expense

Only viewed as immaturity

It’s getting harder and harder every day

To keep up a good face

My lungs being drenched out of every little oxygen molecule

Mama why can’t you see I can’t breath

Listening to the same speech over and over again

Like a broken record in my head

I can never understand the pain and sorrow you have suffered

Because I’m only a child

Mama can you see

Every time you say that to me

My soul rips in half

And thrown into that bottomless sea

Can it be that you just hate me

Using all your hardships against me

Like some endless gun machine

Mama, I can’t breath

The real me has been lost at sea

Never knowing how I could get you to see

I couldn’t breath

You never really could understand the real me

Unfortunately

I can no longer breath