The Lies I Tell Myself

I feel you inside my heart and mind,

there’s a warmth you left behind.

But it slips away day by day,

getting colder as the seasons change.

In my dreams I can hear you.

It’s all so real

in the dead of night

when I miss you the most.

But when I’m awake

I can’t remember you.

Or is that just a lie I tell myself?

Have I forgotten you?

Are you here?

Will you ever be here again?

I need you but that’s a lie too.

I know you whisper my name

into the breeze and send it my way.

When the moonlight touches my skin,

and the night chill sweeps past me

I realise it’s you.

You’re here and yet you aren’t.

I guess I’ll never truly know if it’s you,

but I want to live in this lie I tell myself.

Because imaging you're here

brings comfort that no one

and nothing else can give me.

Show me a sign that it's not a lie.

I’ll beg you each and every night.

And no matter how many times

you show me you’re here

it is never enough.

What can I do to let you go?

No, don’t tell me.

I want to live in this lie a little longer.