Shadows of the Past

The shadows they accumulate within

A twisted, tormented rattle that crawls underneath your skin

Every heart broken

Every tear that has escaped down your cheek

And every tear you held back to hide your grief

The shadows linger, like twisted branches

And they grow, intertwined with the goodness of your soul

The monsters that whisper dread in your ear

Insecurity, doubt, fear

They take hold of you

Your happiness turns to worry

As fast the smile took over your face the sorrow took over your body

And you are now in a completely different place

You feel heavy, all your dreams tainted in congealed blood

The blood of your hope slowly dying

All the hurt you thought you'd got over

Slowly envelops you and eats away at all you thought was certain

Into an uncertain feeling of impending doom

The light that was burning so bright within

In seconds is now dim

The monsters claw at your feet, they pull you down

Everyone around you sees happiness and smiles

And you thought you were finally rid of the monsters

You thought you were free

But in one lonely moment

One instance

All the happiness over months that you had found

Is now under a deep dark cloud

The thunder rumbles, drowning out you attempts to be positive

Every positive glimmer of hope you try to conjure up

Is swallowed up by the demons in your soul

You feel alone once more

And doubt the words from those you adore

You see deceit in honesty

Trickery in any kind gestures

And you contemplate the same dark fate every loving moment brought you

Every loving word from those that hurt you

Every time you told yourself, surely this is it

And even though this time you feel it to be different

The love feels true

Every little sign of hesitation, uncertainty, any fear the other person may harbor

Someone that has been just as hurt as you thus treads with caution

Becomes a terribly bad omen

And you feel yourself doomed

Questioning if you should jump this ship you fear might sink

As it heads into deeper water that you fear might finally drown you

You try to fight it, fight the voices, fight the claws that pull at your ankles

But every positive thought you conjure, you hear yourself say a negative back

The daemons of doubt plant in your head using your voice

Trying to deceive you into thinking that this is your intuition

Trying to lead you into a self fulfilling prophecy

You can not shake these daemons, these shadows lurking within you

For they are a part of you that has been neglected for so long, they've rotted

A putrid side of yourself, that in it's attempt to save you, only destroys you further

Crippling any happiness you finally grasp

By overshadowing it in your souls darkest layers of pain