Just because I am a closed book does not mean my feelings should go unnoticed. Yes of course, I get nervous when asked "are you ohkay?" Especially in front of a room full of other people and yes only two people across the room who can't even hear you count as a room full of people... Why? My anxiety says so.
Does that mean I don't want to be checked on? No, it just means to please ask me quietly, perhaps write it down on a paper or text it to me real fast. I'll be sure to answer I just need some help here.
Just because I won't unlock the chains that guard my pages from being seen, does not mean I am pushing you or anyone else away, I am just simply afraid that if I vent then my feelings will not matter and if I vent, I may be looked at as if I am begging for attention and though I know you are aware that I am not, I am still afraid.
So if you could just kindly hold my hand or perhaps hug me, that would be fine. I just want to be held most of the time.
Most of the time I want to be told everything will be ohkay because even when I know it won't, its gotta be at some point.
And at some point if it is not, well that's alright... I mean its gonna have to be.
But just know, that because I am a closed book that does not mean to dismiss my obvious feelings.
Just hug me...
Whisper in my ear that everything is going to be alright...
Hug me all day
And if you have to,
Hold me all night