Ruined

You immature and ruined child

Life always misery

With such blatant ignorance as this

You told me "know one sees

No matter what you say or do

Their own hypocrisy"

Constantly trying to find my sister

But she died at seventeen

So self absorbed, you left me

To the wolves, it's in our genes

Expecting apologies

Makes a petty girl of me

Expecting anything

From a beast should be foreseen

Fault placed in my palms

For the kindness that I show

Blame on my head, hung

Forgiveness I'll never know

Your man who molested

Your little sister tested

All the beliefs

In which she had vested

But he wasn't satisfied

The more that she denied

And on her birthday lured her

Where yet again he'd try

When he failed he left her

Young, drunk and barely dressed

As my whole life was destroyed

Wishing I were dead

A thought I'd much rather avoid

What's worse is the memory

Of you beating and accusing me

Of mother ignoring and slapping me

Of father's insecurities:

"What does this mean for me?"

"Slut" salted onto the wounds

That I'm wrapped in

I halted the sounds and announced

What had happened

To you the night that

You were drugged and raped

Was it your fault as well,

That you didn't escape?

Don't question my reality

When you were never there

Don't fain some morality

Or pretend you ever cared

I'd hoped for an apology

But you are ruined entirely

This torment that is your life

I admit to loving, karmically

Call me out, it's all my fault

That the man that you chose

Chose to assault

Your only little sister

Oh but hey, how's your new "mister"?

The one who nearly killed you

He said he's sorry, he's just disturbed

The monsters we turn into

Dressed all in black

Insulting the kettle

You're the one who's back

In the abuse where you've settled

Hold your children like a prize

The good you could create

They too will despise

Their awful mother whom I hate

You immature and ruined child

Life always misery

Such blatant ignorance as this

I fear you'll never see