Reminiscing...

Reminiscing has me feeling weak



The mask makes it hard to speak



Being a man makes it hard to weep



Memories make it hard to proceed



Trapped in this prison of accomplishments and failures



All I have is my spread seed



Now I don't know what I need.



When you've been thru everything I've been thru its hard to choose a creed.



I want to believe...



I fall, I bleed, then comeback and achieve...



but somehow things feel different.



Times shifted.



I don't know if I can go back like I always did and find myself once again lifted.



Broken thoughts are like shards of glass



Poking and prodding



Leaving me in my own self made blood bath.



The salt of my tears, the culmination of my fears



I look to seers but find nothing dear



If I could start again



Find a way....



For mistakes of today can be traced way back into yesterday.



I'm so good at finding band aids I never truly took the time to heal



I always played the hand no matter how bad the deal.



Now it feels like my fates sealed...


I look around and think to myself this cant be real...

And looking around I don't know what to feel...