She calls herself abnormal. She is thought to be gay.
She calls herself liberal. She is crude.
She calls herself atheist. She is outrageous.
She rejects culture. She is considered vulgar.
How easily they forget, that she was born
To walk the divide of two cultures.
That she is neither entirely this or that.
How conveniently they forget, that the
Norms they prefer are no longer the norms.
Even in the culture they came from.
And she asks for nothing but a small diversion
From said values.
All she asks for is her solitary independence.
And for that she becomes the villain.
A villain who wants to kill those, who care for her.
A villain who found their concern controlling.
A villain who found their protection stifling.
They worry for her loneliness.
But why did they not care about her loneliness,
When she did feel alone.
When they moved her seven seas apart.
When they feared the boys because of sex.
When they feared girls because of influence.
The very people who walked the same divide as she did.
And now that she is old enough not to feel lonely in her own company.
When she appreciates it quite a bit, actually.
Now they fear for her loneliness, for when they are not around.
When all they have taught her, her whole life, is to be wary of people.
And yet for them, she unwillingly tries to find someone.
But even then she disappoints.
Because she doesn't have the right to choose whom she falls in love with.
As if love is an option.
She has tried her best to be decent.
She doesn't drink. She doesn't smoke.
She doesn't gamble. She doesn't sell her body.
She never dyed her hair. She never modified her body.
And all she wanted since she was seventeen.
Was to love a babe that her heart chose.
A fervent wish.
Something that is breaking her heart to give up.
But an infant is an outsider, for his or her blood.
Yet a man is not?
Thus, she is expected to become a breeding cattle,
Even when the idea feels like a violation of her body.
Because they say she can only love a child of her own body.
Even when she insists otherwise.
Yet she is the villain. And they the victims.
Because she "fails" to understand their concern.
All she knows is, if she becomes a mother.
She will accept her child for who they are.
With love. Not with disappointment.
Because she has learned, you cannot make anyone happy
If they refuse to be happy with you.