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Please Watch my Watering, My Love

A Fretful Crown Cinquain

By Loryne AndaweyPublished about a year ago 1 min read
11
Please Watch my Watering, My Love
Photo by Daniel Öberg on Unsplash

My love

I’m terrified

For the children we’ll have

Because I just killed a fucking

Cactus

*

Cactus

You heard that right

I thought it was thirsty

So I went ahead and gave it

Water

*

Water

In which it drowned

But that’s not all, oh no!

You should see what I did to the

Lilies

*

Lilies

That have withered

Because I thought they too

Would suffer from the surfeit and

Perish

*

Perish

Like these chicken

Thoughts. Please help me, my love.

Watch my watering so they can

Flower

*

*

My first encounter with crown cinquains was through the work of the wonderful Dharrsheena Raja Segarran who wrote Call of the Ocean, which you can read below.

*

*

Thank you for lingering.

nature poetrylove poems
11

About the Creator

Loryne Andawey

Health, Happiness & Abundance.

Currently enjoying the company of Francis, Mike, C.H., Gammastack, Michelle, Cosimo, Kristen, Bronson, Bella, Talia, Sean, Babs, Kelli, Rick, Dharrsheena, Heather, Gina and many, many more!

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

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  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  3. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

  1. Expert insights and opinions

    Arguments were carefully researched and presented

  2. Eye opening

    Niche topic & fresh perspectives

  3. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  4. Masterful proofreading

    Zero grammar & spelling mistakes

  5. On-point and relevant

    Writing reflected the title & theme

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Comments (9)

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  • Cathy holmesabout a year ago

    Aww. The poor cactus. Love it!

  • Mariann Carrollabout a year ago

    So relatable, I had a cactus and it did not live long ,lol

  • 😉❤️

  • Excellent, and great to see you branching out into other poetic forms, though I get lost with them, though I fined defined forms can often help you in your creation

  • Heather Hublerabout a year ago

    I loved that you tried something new and it worked so well! I was laughing a little as I can pretty much kill any plant without trying...hahaha. But really, this was thoughtful, clever and a joy to read. Great work :) And thank you for adding me to your profile. I appreciate it!!

  • Lol, your Crown Cinquain made me laugh because I'm the sameeeeee! I cannot keep a plant alive even if my life depended on it. I can never be trusted with a kid. Loved your humorous take on the Crown Cinquain and thank you for the shoutout!

  • Gina C.about a year ago

    I love this so much, Loryne! I really adored the stanza about your future kids 😅 I've definitely had that thought too! And I loved all the flower elements in here. This is such a wonderful style. Amazing!

  • Babs Iversonabout a year ago

    Magnificent!!! Loving it!!!💕💖

  • Alex H Mittelman about a year ago

    This is fantastic! It’s hard watering cactus, I’ve done that too! 😀

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