Pain

im torn deep in my darkened state.

the battle begins yet again.

who do i choose..

which side do i take..

i cant take this stress its making me ache.

who do i call.

what do i say.

the battles between my heart and brain.

i have two that i love but one tells me not to even though they know.

and so i sit and so i hide

and tremble with insecurity and thoughts of madness.

what do i do when this pain is happening.

what should i say.

how should i act..

i swear to god it feels like a heart attack.

i cant eat and i cant seem to drink.

swallowing it all makes my throat ache.

the pressure is building continuously consuming.

this pain is killing me.

but i cant tell.

i feel like im lied to

but i cant never tell.

who do i believe

i love them both

but i guess its probably going to come down to who i love the most.

there is no protection from this torment i mentioned.

and im starting to feel cold...

I dont care but yet im still there.

how much longer do i have to go.

with out a moment of rest where my heart doesnt feel at rest.

im at a cross road with to many directions

and i truly dont know which way to go.

the pain isnt subsiding nor is it dying.

i cant hold out much more.

my heart is bleeding with all of these feelings i dont know if this needle can sew.

my hearts in pieces and im trying to put them back where they belong.

but some comes and kicks them making me miss some

as others go flying to distant shores

im tired of dressing this pain that im feeling.

im running to short on bandages.

it just keeps bleeding

will it ever stop repeating how much hurt is in my soul.

im tired of deflecting and second guessing.

im to the point i would rather be alone.

this changes nothing i still will be suffering

all the way down to my bones.

so i guess i am done now.

im sure they will find out.

that this shit is getting old.

im tired of hurting

with pain constantly lurking

i just want to go.

sleep may help but i feel all by my self

i cant take this pain no more...