It Will Get Better

Broken Heart

By Regina Brooks

I did everything I could to keep myself busy. I was missing YOU like crazy. Which led me into making YouTube videos to keep busy. I was going to make that money and it was going to help keep my mind off of you. Shooting videos didn’t work to keep my mind off you. I portrayed makeup as I drank my Cabernet. However, other “tubers” are doing makeup better than me, that was how I felt. It didn't matter, all I wanted was YOU. How do I keep my mind off of an old Bae?

It’s so hard. I got to keep busy with a broken heart. When I think about you, my blood just clots. I Love YOU.

Make more videos, more calls, more texts, or shed more tears. Either way, I’m losing in the game of money and love. People can take advantage of the many possibilities. I will do what I can so they can see anything in me. My love, do you care, do you watch? You don’t have anything to do with me anymore. I'm just hoping YOU will think of me again. How do I do that?

It’s so hard. I got to keep busy with a broken heart. When I think about YOU, my blood just clots.

Don’t look at my videos. They are for me and my favs. Don't watch them unless YOU want me. It just leads me on, which is wrong. When emergencies come up.... does anyone show up? Where are YOU? It's sad because it's between legal and evil. Everyone has their own people. However, some take a downward slope. I have a little bit of hope that we can recover. Can we recover?

It’s so hard. I got to keep busy with a broken heart. When I think about YOU, my blood just clots.

Have they come to any procedures? Nah, they are doing their own thang. I feel lost and confused. They are no help. So, I go back to what I know in my videos. I try to make more money. We “tubers” must keep looking out for each other, and don’t be a bother. We need to keep winning that hard cash. I do not want to start off from scratch.

It’s so hard. I got to keep busy with a broken heart. When I think about YOU, my blood just clots.

I wish my insides will be normal again. It's not butterflies, but upset stress that is doing me in. Will I ever see you again? How would I act? I think I would be extremely angry but happy at the same time. However, I would want you to want me back. You'd tell me every day how my beauty is in the bag. I think it’s fair to me and justified because of the hellish ways you did to me.

It’s so hard. I got to keep busy with a broken heart. When I think about YOU, my blood just clots.

How do I get over you? Post more videos? Get zooted to cover the pain? Put on more makeup? How busy do I need to be? Why don’t you feel like I feel and want to be with me? Love is great. Did you ever desire me or was it a betrayal ? You were my true love. How do I get over that without getting so fat?

It’s so hard. I got to keep busy with a broken heart. When I think about YOU, my blood just clots.

I want to share my days and times with YOU. I don’t want YOU to get me on the YouTube screen but in front of YOU. I want to feel YOU and touch your skin. I want YOU to desire me again and I don’t want YOU to be a memory. It’s funny how we wish different things. You want me to disappear, whereas I want YOU to always be there.

It’s so hard. I got to keep busy with a broken heart. When I think about YOU, my blood just clots.

I keep remembering YOU and feeling YOU, but I can't get to YOU. You saw my YouTube videos. I wish we can be back to normal. I wish we can be back to "Us." Did we ever have an "Us?" I want to be the person YOU come home to every night. I want to be the person that makes YOU put up a fight. Someone else is doing that and making YOU happy. I must move on. I don’t want to, but I want to be happy. I wish I can just see you one more time. I want to touch YOU and feel your skin close to mine. Would that even make a difference?

It’s so hard. I got to keep busy with a broken heart. When I think about YOU, my blood just clots.

I did it. I found someone who I love. I love them so much! They make me so happy. They love me too. We love each other and we make each other happy! We are partners and a team. I am happy.

It's not hard to be happy. I can be busy with a full happy loving heart. I don't think about YOU anymore. I am in a loving relationship now.