It's the little things
It's ok to be proud of yourself
I'm finally in a place where I can admit to myself that years of therapy have paid off just a bit.
After going through seven therapists and two therapy offices you'd assume that for whatever reason I go, that I'd be fine by now.
No, in fact all that I've managed to work on is understanding my emotions.
You see when you experience any type of trauma it can affect the way you process your life completely.
My case is that I have learned to not internalize everything no matter how small.
I say how small because just until recently one small thing could make me shut down and ruin my whole day.
Due to one big traumatic thing that will always have some hold on my life.
No matter how much time I spend on getting better.
I always fall three places behind my goal for my continuation to get better.
To get a hold on my life as a progressive human being. Nothing frustrates me more then not having control over my life.
Over myself, "myself" is loosely based on my emotions.
Where I couldn't stand to cry or let myself feel sense of love towards myself.
That's one of the things I reval in now.
I'm no longer afraid to cry, or speak how I really feel in that exact moment.
I love being able to look at myself and seeing someone strong, someone full of life.
I know that in all this time all I've managed to complete is this.
But to see what I am seeing now is such an accomplishment.
It really is the little things that makes life worth it.
About the author
I am a published poet four times over in Topeka Kansas. I rarely write happy sounding poems or stories. Most of what I write is personal in a way, or somewhat controversial. Nothing I write is meant to offend anyone. Please read and enjoy!