Indoor Monolith

Months before it hit

I was already practicing what's it like to be sick

I hate allergies and during that times my backward analogies to myself

I wasn't good with mental health

The semester was good, my friends struggle around

I tried fixing something that wasn't broken

It was gone, and nobody wanted it, I was selfish with it all

I cried nights over and over again

I decided I wanted to take a break

Put a gap into my breath and focus on what my brain hates

-

4 months go by

I'm ready to go back outside

Happy and thrilled, I forgot what people are like

I spent a week hanging out with friends

We were joking about how the world would end

We knew that this small disease will blow over

Then the next week it came to our city

Maybe it was karma, bad luck, it wouldn't become something big right?

-

4 months pass again

I really miss my friends, we were all so close

College campus shut down and now we are behind black mirrors

I'm used to this you know? I've been here before even when I was born

But some of my friends weren't

I felt my mental health dip again

I'm waking up to nothing

Play games, hearing music, and gain weight

It was a common daily routine, I even became a little bit mean

I became cold, a bit a goblin or a troll underneath a bridge

My hair grew longer than it ever had before

Social media was such a bore

Youtube and other platforms ran out of things for me to watch

I binged everything and sometimes even my friends

I stop talking and let them write the paragraphs

Somehow as a poet, during the start of it all

I lost my words. My rhythm. the sweet sounds that come out of mind.

-

A year passes

I was lucky enough to find someone who understands me

Dust me off, tell me "I know, it's not that easy"

I thought I was ok, I was in a dark place thinking it was light

I was a confused moth man

She has shown me, my wings are beautiful, I was an angel to her

I got back into school, giving it my all

Gaining back what I loss

Chasing roller coasters, killing time, trying to speak like I'm divine

I went into therapy, try to find what's inside of me

It took a lot of work, crying, urges, and moments where I was nowhere

But I was still there

-

This year, is better

Colleges are slowly opening up

Solutions are around the corners, free of charge

Still, I am afraid though

Numbers are still rising and falling

We keep hope in our hearts

Sometimes conspiracies in our ears

I hope the best for every year for everyone

Money is hard, mental health is dropping at times

More struggles around

I hope, I know things will get better for whoever is reading this

It has to, for we, all of us, had enough

We need a break, good news, and something brightens our days

I see it, it's coming, I know it

Don't give it up on it