I’m So Tired…

Opening my eyes and for a quick second, things seemed fine. Until the wave of responsibilities and my troubles would hit me vigorously. Things didn’t seem so fine after all. Sometimes, I wished those seconds could last a lifetime. Thinking about reevaluating my life but I knew problems would always be there. Getting out of bed was a burden. I lay there for hours, distracting myself with the blue screen. Maybe my worries will magically dissipate. The more I laid there though, the more heavy the weight of responsibility would crush me. I get tired sometimes. I’m not a robot. I’m human. I finally put my phone down and sat up. Thinking about finally dragging myself out the comfort of my bed but can’t seem to take action of my thoughts. Breakfast, shower, into my work clothes, work at 2pm, get off at 10pm, dinner, shower again and off to bed. The days seemed so repetitive. How could someone live life like this? Operating at speeds you can barely keep up with but still running efficiently like when your Iphone is on the last percentage. How can I continue on like this? Distracting my anxiety with responsibility. Then, distracting myself from my responsibilities with my phone. All the overstimulation from constantly scrolling through peoples fake happy lives and the motivational quotes. Not even those could inspire me to break free from this cage of sorrow and depression. Fatigued, I put my phone down and closed my eyes. The cycle repeats tomorrow, and just the thought causes me to drift away. Life means the existence of an individual human being or animal. THE EXISTENCE. How are we living life if we aren’t simply existing? Working everyday, very hard just to simply exist. I’m not a robot. I’m human. I’m so tired…