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I II III IIII

I II III IIII

By Y KPublished 2 months ago 1 min read
43
I II III IIII
Photo by Serhii Tyaglovsky on Unsplash

I.

When you first held me,

burning was a small expense

for the light of sight.

II.

And then you washed me,

and finally I was clean;

you licked my pink wounds.

III.

I couldn't help it,

breathing you in but not out.

I wanted to float.

IIII.

When cave-in happens,

around the flesh of my soul,

I'll smile in repose.

love poems
43

About the Creator

Y K

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insights

  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  3. Eye opening

    Niche topic & fresh perspectives

  1. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  2. Masterful proofreading

    Zero grammar & spelling mistakes

  3. On-point and relevant

    Writing reflected the title & theme

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Comments (17)

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  • Antoinette L Brey2 months ago

    That was really good

  • Dooney Potter2 months ago

    The smooth progression through the elements and the way they are used to express deep intomacy is genius. “Burning was a small expense” speaks of giving into that flame regardless of consequences, just like love. “Breathing you in but not out” is just intoxicating, possessively beautiful and expressing that feel of not wanting to let go. The last haiku hits home with sober reality and yet it speaks of a connection that lasts for eternity. Deeply touched by this piece.

  • PK Colleran2 months ago

    Beautiful 💐

  • Roshawn2 months ago

    I love how you did this

  • Poppy the Poet2 months ago

    Damn this is a cool poem

  • Ash Taylor2 months ago

    love the way you interpreted the elements!

  • Cathy holmes2 months ago

    Nicely done. Congrats on the top story

  • Zohaib Sunesara2 months ago

    An intriguing poem with a unique structure! The use of numbers as line breaks creates a unique rhythm and flow. I enjoy how the poem unfolds and the themes explored within it. Thank you for sharing your poetry.

  • Mohd Fahim2 months ago

    Nice work what about its intrested poetry Dread please. https://vocal.media/poets/dear-coffee

  • Caroline Jane2 months ago

    Oooo trippy and dark. Great work.

  • Allie Bickerton2 months ago

    Gorgeously written! Congratulations on top story!!!

  • CA2 months ago

    Really well done!

  • I love the natural progression through the elements in relation to the development of a relationship. Congrats on Top Story!

  • zakariyya sadik2 months ago

    Awesome

  • C. H. Richard2 months ago

    Powerful! Left a heart and subscribed.

  • Melissa Ingoldsby2 months ago

    Reminds me of death. Excellent. Hearted and subscribed

  • Anna2 months ago

    this is beautiful!

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