Expectations

I get all A's

so I'm supposed to go to the best college to be a lawyer or a doctor

I'm quiet and I do my work

so I'm supposed to be a saint who's never faced temptation and mistakes

I'm larger than average

so I'm supposed to hate my body and try to lose all of the weight

I can be pretty girly

so I'm supposed to be attracted to guys and never like to get dirty

I smile and no cuts are on my wrists

so I'm supposed to not have experienced depression and self-harming thoughts

My mom seems pretty nice

so I'm supposed to forget all the insults and bruises she's inflicted on me

I'm smarter than my sister

so I'm supposed to drop everything and tutor her,

because obviously I know how to make her learn

I never had a father

so I'm supposed to yearn for one and have daddy issues

I don't struggle in school

so I'm supposed to not know what it's like to work hard for something

My family wants me around

so I'm supposed to pretend not to hear their insults and forgive them for every lie

I'm supposed to be perfect

I'm supposed to never lash out

I'm supposed to

I'm supposed to

I'm supposed to

Well excuse me for not fitting into your tiny little boxes!

Oh, was I not what you expected?

Sorry, not sorry,

I'm so much more than your collection of words struggling to define me

so I refuse to live a lie based on the stereotypes you want to guide me

with

Those aren't the things that are going to make me happy.

I don't tell you how to live your life

so don't try to control mine.