Escape

The morning is cool and dark

As I wander into its embrace

The sun yet to break free

And rise to the surface

***

The crisp bite of breath

Walking slippery underfoot

A lightness of step

Feeling good to be free

***

Silent but for my steps

And loud breathing to my ears

Heartbeat pounding in my chest

Hand wiping away cold tears

***

Everyone is wont to argue

But this feels sudden and final

Whence it came and its unusual severity

Caught me unawares

***

Still, at the moment I’m distraught

Escaping into pre-dawn dark

Caught betwixt day and night

Unsure if I am wrong or right

***

To settle on the finality

And finally, choose me

I long for your bedside

But know it was destroying me

***

No more harassed and abused

And always told I’m wrong

I’m worth nothing, I’m ugly and boring

But feeling there is nowhere else I belong

***

Still, at this moment I’m distraught

And already missing you

Those things you say, you do not mean

But I probably deserve them anyway

***

But, this early morn I’m on my own

And unable to return

To the only home, I’ve ever known

Feeling forever all alone