defeating perceived needs

i cleared out the past for good this time, amidst a little spring cleaning

i found, beneath the clutter, that all to be deciphered is decieveving

fabricated interpretations, rather than the facts i’d been perceiving

it truly took me by suprise, to recognize the dangers in believing

i felt as though my past shaped me, and for that, deserved safe keeping

but it was a bondage, as the meaning of life, is to simply give life meaning

life is happening now, its cause must be free of then intervening

i made my history a safe haven, free of new afflictions, but free of healing

to dwell only in well-known territory, where emotions were familiar and fleeting

the cost of my cowardice, however, was no where near as pleasing

it beat me down and wrung me out, forcing me into retreating

i finally waved my white flag, and saw the days of old receding

when the teardrops that blurred my vision fell, a brand new world was superseding

peace rushed in — the solace i longed for,

and forfeit a great deal in receiving

it’s quite comical that letting go, implies that only my grasp needed releasing

when the chokehold that my past held me in, is what complicated leaving

the phrase “letting go” is reductive, and incredibly misleading

the act needs a more fitting name, like “perceived-need-defeating”

that sounds substantially more exhausting, and therefore less deceiving