Conversations with Artists

Edgar, my good fellow.

Yes, 'tis I. How may I be of service.

I have read your collected works of late...

Oh! And what say you?

They are...rather...dark...

Yes indeed they are! A reflection of the world around I I daresay.

QUITE, QUITE! One wonders, however...

You may speak bluntly, sir. I assure you I shall take no insult.

...ah...yes, of course. Well, you see...my wife and I were wondering if you might do better if you, say, wrote a nice love poem or two? A slight respite from the dark and dreary life you portray in your otherwise very well written stories? Try your hand at a touch of flummadiddle, as it were. I fear you might frighten the ladies, you see...

Indeed? Well, I shall try my hand at it then! One would hate to make a hornswoggle of oneself, after all!

Well, then, that's the sockdolager! I look forward to re-

I believe I have already thought of a tale that would suit your request!

I must confess I am at sea, sir! I do believe you are trying to make a sucker of me!

It begins with a young couple in such love that even the angels are jealous...

What ho! Excellent start I say!

...though, one of them dies from a cold wind...

You are barking up the wrong tree, I fear-

...sent by the jealous angels...

Now see here, Poe! Hold your horses!

...so her lover lays down in the tomb...

The man must be katzenjammer!

and holds her corpse...

Oh dear me, it is getting quite late, is it not? If you'll pardon me, I must Absquatulate.

Ain't I a stinker!

Katzenjammer: cats misery (drunk/hangover)

Hornswoggle: embarrass greatly

Sockdolager: settles a matter

Bodacious: good or impressive

Absquatulate: leave suddenly

Flummadiddle: frill/ foolish