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Change begins again

4.3.23

By HerBrownProductionsLLCPublished about a year ago 2 min read
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4.3.23

I am ready for something so deep that it changes me, that it unlocks all the power within me. Something that nobody’s never seen in me, a permanent glow that will never leave me. Something that turns me away from all sadness and anger buried deep inside me. All that won’t bubble to the surface at one time because of the pain that comes to mind. The agony that takes over my body as I can’t even breathe because of the anxiety, the “heavy weight” sitting on my chest full of upset. I’m ready for a new chapter that will cause me never to look back because as a matter of fact I don’t want any of that old shit back. I don’t want none of that life that I used to live. I am still angry that I still deal with the same issues from the same people that I did as a kid. The same folks who know how to make me feel small. Although I don’t think about them at all until it comes down to how they’ve treated me and made me feel. I am the main one I know fighting out of the old life that I’ve lived and the old person that I was. I know the cause of mostly all of my trauma. I need something so deep just for me. Something that prepares me to no longer explain my reality nor myself. It’s okay to ask for help but I’d rather suffer in silence by myself than to cut myself deeper from the ignorance in response from others. I have often times discovered that many are disgusted by my survival alone but they have no idea how many times I would have laid down and died just because. The dedication to misunderstanding me has been astonishing. Mentally it makes me stronger when I keep to myself. The softer side of me I’m ashamed to be they can never and could never just love nor accept me as me. Never wanting to accept better from me they just want to use and see the broken me. Astonishing, I’m over translating my soul, especially to those being easily manipulated into the oblivion. A new beginning that completes me feeling safe and healed. Putting myself back in position to win again.

- Denesha R.McGee.

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sad poetrysurreal poetryslam poetryperformance poetryinspirationalheartbreak
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About the Creator

HerBrownProductionsLLC

Poetry & Creative content

Just a Black girl creative looking to write and inspire. Poetry, History, Devotion, Entertainment.

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  • Mary J Taylorabout a year ago

    The child you once were to the women you have become. The suffering you dealt with through the years. I feel so bad i didnt see all of this.......

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