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Broken Shell

by Frankie 2 years ago in sad poetry
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The new you

When all you can take

Engulfs and takes over you 

Like a huge wave

Of salty ocean water.

But you make it through.

It’s tenacity and harshness has chopped away at your surface 

but your still intact.

Just when you think the big wave has passed 

and you survived 

and the worst of the worst
is over 

You’ll gratefully try ..

To come up for air 

There will be this little wave , 

right after
the coupe de grace

one may say. 

And this last little wave

gives way for your exhaustion to set in ...

you will feel your muscles aching 

You’ll forget what air feels like as you Squirm helplessly, 

In the all encompassing


You will paddle and fight

to get that little breath

The salt water will pour

into your mouth

and down your throat 

And you’ll cry from it harsh sting

and writhe in pain 

But you’ll keep coming up, 

even with the salt water

rushing into your nasal passages

and drowning you

from the inside out ... 


determined .. 

You’ll keep coming up . 

Savoring each short burst of air .

Though it seems you may make it,

this couldn’t possibly be the end,

your fighting and kicking and thrashing have got to do something ? 


But Your still drowning 

just slowly,

more resistant

then if you just took the great pitfall, 

Just gave in

and let the water

fill you completely 

Let it fill up your lungs

and weigh you down

encapsulating you,

absorbing you..

into its deep dark depths

But wait! 

You emerge 

And when you finally emerge

still tasting that salty fishy ocean water

in your nose,

in your eyes

in your mouth,

in all your senses

in your very pores 

When you thought it was nearing the end 


you find yourself

close to shore ,

Able to stand

and to breathe,

and once again

you feel safe,

Once again

you are alive 


Your slight feelings of triumph

in your moment of survival 

Will be interrupted, 

shamed .

You see
your different now,

You’ve fought death

you’ve made another day 

and forever ,


you will feel different

because your life has changed, 

you’ve seen firsthand what the end is 

you lost your goggles

and your boogie board

and seen the ocean for what it really is .

What it really can do .. 

And that understanding

of capability

will be with you

every morning

through everyday 

and no one

will get it .

the people you interact with 

will not have seen what you’ve seen 

felt anything close to what you’ve felt . 

And now

a fear of water

sets in

Of drowning

of the end

and no one will get it .

And they’ll laugh it off 

and call your fears irrational 

“It was just one time.”

“you didn’t die . “

“Get OVER it “


a little piece of you

did die

You met fear,


you lost control

And this big piece of you


and hardened

and manifested ... 

And transformed you 

into a whole different being .. 


since your not

the being you used to be

You’ll be described

as “different “ 



And that word

will make the salty

putrid taste

of the ocean

fill your throat again,

your nose, 

your senses.

Cause in a way

it’s true...

Your no longer

fully intact 

Your edges

are jagged

and misshapen 

your not a full shell anymore 

your deformed 



your just , 

a fraction of the whole ..

Somewhere in those waves

your fragile shell


And since then

it’s been game over 

Who wants to take home something broken? 

no matter how pretty

it was


sad poetry

About the author


I have no pleasure in the stimulants in which I so madly indulge. It hasnt been in the pursuit of pleasure that Ive periled life and reputation, but a desperate attempt to escape the torturing memories, & a sense of insupportable lonelines

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