20 in 3 months

I'm turning twenty in three months, and I don't know how I feel.

I haven't found my one true love, and I don't know if it's real.

My mental health's been somewhat rough. I haven't slept in weeks.

I cannot eat; I skip my meals and drown myself in drinks.

I don't know what to do in life and how to achieve my dreams.

Being an adult is for sure not as easy as it seems.

My room's a mess, just like my life. I don't want it to be clean.

When people say that life is fun, what do they actually mean?

I stay in bed most of the time and watch some stupid shows.

I stay up late then sleep all day; that's how my life now goes.

I stopped talking to my friends. I don't know what to say.

Every morning I wake up, and my life seems sad and grey.

I'm scared of turning twenty and not achieving much in life.

I wish my life were just as easy as it was when I was five.

I don't want to overthink what other people say.

I know it messes with my brain, but I do it anyway.

I feel so pressured all the time. I'm never good enough.

I wish I knew what was wrong with me. I know my life's not tough.

Some people struggle every day to find something to eat.

I starve myself on purpose, such an ungrateful kid.

I've got too much free time in life, that's why I'm always so upset.

I'm not depressed; I want attention. That's what my dad once said.

I'm not upset because I'm bored. I don't know why I feel so sad.

I struggle with my mental health. I wish he'd understand.

I'm not asking for your attention. I would rather be alone.

But you make it hard for me to feel myself at home.

I'm mentally exhausted of keep playing pretend.

Maybe if not here, out there somewhere, they could understand.

I'm turning twenty in three months. I want to cry and scream.

I want to find my inner peace. I hate being nineteen.

I want to get my life on track and start chasing my dreams.

Maybe I'll find my one true love and find out how it feels.

Maybe I'll start enjoying life and stop avoiding food.

Maybe I'll stop letting others affect my health and mood.

When I'm twenty, I will do better and change for the best.

Right now, I need to take it slow and need to get some rest.