Tales of a Tasmanian Devil

This is the last instalment of a five part series about my five pets. It is preceded by: Dear Chocolate, Lady of the House, The Cat Who Wished He Was a Dog, and A Dog Named Doggo. Note: the other pets and stories ARE referenced here, it may be of use to read the other instalments first!

Ok so TECHNICALLY speaking, he's not actually a Tasmanian devil. But the sounds he makes are just like the Tasmanian devil from Loony Toons, and thus his name was born: Tazzy.

Where do we begin with Tazzy? Perhaps his breeding. Whilst we don't know for a fact what his breeding is, his puppy photos look strikingly similar to those of Doberman-Rottweiler mixes. Strike one.

Tazzy was adopted before the age of 3 months. According to my Animal Behaviour facebook group resources, separating a dog from their littermates before the age of three months means that the dog doesn't fully comprehend the pain of being bitten. Strike two.

Tazzy, whilst being a great deal less bite-y towards me than other members of my family, is still incredibly strong. He's also has a penchant to lunge at mosquitos and other flying bugs at a speed I cannot comprehend. So fast, in fact, that when he accidentally lunged at me instead of a mosquito, I developed a massive frog shaped bruise. Strike three.

Ok, maybe let's rewind. Let's get off on a better foot. Tazzy is a reincarnation of Chocolate, sans Chocolate's grace and elegance but with an added dose of intelligence (minus the self control). Trying to teach self control is impossible, but Tazzy has already learnt far more tricks than any of our other dogs. He can play catch (first one of the seven dogs we've had who can)! Ok, so maybe the bar is a bit low. He can also open doors. He knows how to push open the glass sliding door and understands the concept of using door handles (though he thankfully has not mastered it yet). I'm trying to convince my parents that it would be a good idea to teach Tazzy how to talk, the way Bunny does, but I think they fear the things he would say

If I were to describe Tazzy, he would be an old god, a chaos god. Perhaps another decent name for him would be Loki, as he certainly enjoys his tricks and mischief, but that would imply that he has a game plan instead of just seeking to create as much chaos as possible. Whereas Chocolate would intentionally steal thousand dollar bills to maximise the chaos and anxiety, Tazzy will steal whatever he can get his hands (jaws) on—mail, homework, empty sheets, remote controls, phones, clothes...the list is endless! Unlike Chocolate, who revelled in keeping the bills whole as long as you left it in his mouth, Tazzy will try to rip everything up as soon as he gets a chance. He is clever enough to step on things to prevent you from grabbing it. As the list of items is varied, the chaos created is varied as well. Spam mail stolen? Not a big deal. My only copy of notes for an essay due tomorrow? Chaos.

I have always been deathly afraid of small animals. They seem so fragile, so easily broken. If I were to accidentally drop them, I fear that they would snap their spines in half. But not Tazzy. He was so solidly built with such an amount of wriggle that it was impossible not to drop him. He certainly knows how to land on his feet better than my little cat did! Holding him as a baby took a certain level of skill. Most methods of holding him left various extremities too prone to be nibbled and gnawed at, and he was simply too heavy to be lifted by his neck wrinkles. The best way? See for yourself below.