Why we should celebrate our differences.

As long as I can remember myself, I have always felt very different from other people, and to a younger me this was a tragedy. Children desperately want to belong , to be accepted by the group, they need this experience in order to feel safe, as on a basic animal level not belonging literally means death. For our ancestors it was impossible to survive in the wilderness if they were rejected by a group, hence why for a developing psyche the experiences of not being accepted can be very overwhelming on a biological level. Additionally , as a result of feeling rejected in our formative years , we tend to develop all kinds of limiting beliefs, as children are a lot more likely to assume that the problem lies with them, rather than with the situation. I remember so vividly how I had wished I were someone else , someone “normal” and part of the group.

With time however, I came to value my individuality, as well as see clearly that if people reject me for who I am, they are simply not my people, and we are not in the alignment anyway, so it is hardly a loss. And the more I stay true to myself, the more likely my people will start to gravitate towards me. Additionally , I started to appreciate the gifts that come with the territory of being a bit of an outsider - an independent thought, less affected by the opinions of others and the society, less concern about what other people think of me, less chance to follow a path that is not meant for me, just because it looks great on paper and is seen as “cool” by the majority.

Creativity and individuality go hand in hand, and while both are not appreciated by the society nearly as much as they should be, both benefit the humanity enormously , as the more we can get in touch with our true essence, the more likely we can create something of value for others. The less we conform to the old ideas, the more innovative we can be, the more questions we ask, the more answers and solutions can follow. It is the individuals who once dared to think outside the box, that ended up bringing a progress to the humanity. Many were ahead of their time, not appreciated, ridiculed or even punished by the masses in the beginning. Nicola Tesla, Galileo Galilei, Vincent Van Gog are good examples of this pattern. So being accepted and liked by the majority is certainly overestimated if you look at the bigger picture. On the contrary, being accepted and liked by yourself is of an utter importance, as the absence of it can put brakes on actualising one’s potential.

I am writing these words for those kids and teenagers who perhaps feel like they don’t belong. For the odd ones, the black sheep, for those who look, act or think differently. You may not be the popular ones, but that does not diminish your value. “Your people” will see you, the true you; they will appreciate your uniqueness and see it as a gift.

I am also writing these words for my own inner child, for the part of me that is very vulnerable and innocent. It is she who gives me the creativity, joy and curiosity, the wonder like quality of seeing this world from the eyes of an explorer. And when she feels safe, she is able to be all that, and so much more.