Twelve Steps to Great Speaking and Communicating

Without intending to turn normal people or public speakers into actors or performers, the validity and power of acting skills can be demonstrated time and time again within my coaching and directing experience.

When you produce yourself in front of a group or an audience, you are being faced with an interesting phenomenon called theatrical duality.

Theatrical duality is born out of the expectation an audience always carries within while waiting for the “show” to begin. It is inevitable even in the most technical presentations.

Theatricality has rules, principles, etiquette, and requirements, which cannot be ignored, as they are essential to successful public appearances of any kind, including one on one conversations.

No other realm challenges us like the public realm, as it cleverly demands a re-contextualization of who we are, in order to deliver on the promise of the presentation at hand.

In addition, no other realm exposes “who we are and what we are trying to hide” so clearly. In my view, it counts as one of the most useful training grounds to build self-confidence, self-reliance, and a host of other valuable tools, all essential to healthy personal development.

The public arena is a three-dimensional space or spaciousness, which needs to be filled with life and self-expression.

A stage is always empty and meaningless. This is where the courage to act, speak and make ourselves visible is confronting yet life-affirming.

Space is what there is to identify with and become aware of, first. Space is what grants speakers or actors the freedom they seek. The content of a presentation has to be distinguished from the context or that which contains it.

Space is the true medium of speaking and acting

Often, too much emphasis is given to verbal communication alone: the words or content of presentations. It is also true in everyday interactions.

What make a presentation flat are the lack of space and the lack of quality of the space. Space is where we dwell. Of course, we typically never confront it until we are in public and we feel or sense the lack of it.

For example, a shy individual has removed his or her natural boundary space around him- or herself. When you remove too much space around you, you become a shadow of yourself.

Space is very much the room that you occupy with your energy, and how comfortable you are in it. You can activate it consciously by seeing it “in the room” around you. We call this technique spotting as you literally spot with your eyes a three-dimensional construct around you at least 10 times your size. Are you restricted to your limited body size or are you “projecting” and “radiating” beyond it and having fun with it?

The occupying and projecting of a larger circle of energy around yourself literally grant you your freedom as a communicator. Hence, why these dynamics are so crucial to know and understand.

Self-expression is a function of the quality of the space we are generating, and how much room we allow ourselves to take. The more room you occupy, the more confidence you will feel—it's as straightforward as that!

I have often been amazed at how small living quarters are in Europe compared to the U.S. I've sat at dinner parties in tiny, yet very elegant, flats in London and Paris with a dozen people, and felt like it was incredibly spacious.

The experience of lack of space starts with the speaker or communicator. Space is first contemplated, then "held" or "contained" by a speaker or actor. It MUST BE HELD to have an impact on your presence.

The quality of the physical AND emotional atmosphere around you is a relationship that must be cultivated. Body language and voice power cannot be appreciated without space. For instance, a singer with no space will disappoint us. If you ever doubt that, watch Aretha Franklin perform. She could be in a closet and yet make you feel like she's singing inside a stadium.

Make the space around you big when you speak

Take more space! I promise you’ll be astounded by how much more relaxed and confident you’ll become as a result.

I will be presenting all 12 steps to Great Speaking & Communicating on Vocal Media.

Background

I was gifted three career paths in my life. I first began as a full-time professional stage, soap opera and voice-over actor for 15 years in New York and Hollywood.

I started directing and training actors as well as performers for yet another 15 years, while still very active as a voice-over artist and director (Hollywood Actors Studio).

As the actor's studio grew in reputation, the business and corporate world wanted to learn performance skills. I founded Speakers & Artists International, Inc. in 2003, a training ground dedicated to public speaking and business communication.

At age 40, I began a long journey as a visual artist, which led me to begin writing. This was 20 years ago. Writing continues to be an essential aspect of my development as an artist.

Philippe Stonebeck is my pen name, while Eric Stone has been my stage and coaching name for many years. I paint under the name Artist Benichou (Philippe Benichou).