Staying On Track with Your Goals

Innerlight: Staying On Track With Your Goals – Part 1 – Boredom and Procrastination

by: T. S. Michaels

BOREDOM

Often times when we sit and try to relax, or attempt to do something productive, we face the deeded boredom. It makes us want to get up and break our focus. Try and stay. Notice yourself and bring awareness to your goals.

Boredom has become a common challenge. In our day to day lives many of us feel the need to have our minds perpetually stimulated. Eating breakfast we watch TV, subway ride we read a book, at the gym or driving its music. In the evening we are on our phones or laptop with the TV on in the background. Its like we wade through life waist high in a river of stimuli.

Any gap in this river, any absence of stimulus for even a second brings discomfort. If there is awkward silence in a conversation, we scramble to fill the void with talk. If the WiFi goes out and our screen goes blank, we panic to get back online.

So its no mystery that boredom comes up when we sit. Its common to have to fight an irresistible urge to do anything other than just sit there. So we begin to entertain ourselves. Our mind drift to daydreams, the past, present or the future. We are unable to just stay with the boredom.

Trungpa wrote about two types of boredom which he explained as “Cool Boredom and Hot Boredom”. Hot boredom is that strong uncomfortable feeling that compels us to seek entertainment. In his words “Hot boredom is like being locked in a padded cell. We are bored, closed in, miserable and irritated.” But as we evolve, we can begin to move into Cool Boredom. Which is when we begin to notice boredom without reacting to it in the same way. It no longer feels so claustrophobic. Rather than feeling confined, cool boredom is spacious. At first its hard to stop wanting the boredom to end, but after a while a small space begins to emerge. In that space we notice 'what happens when I stay with boredom?' 'what if I don't seek distractions or get swept away with restlessness?' 'what if I can get curious about what boredom feels like?' In this space we are no longer afraid of allowing ourselves to experience it. When we do that over and over, a subtle shift occurs. Sitting alone in silence and stillness is bound to bring up feelings of boredom. But when we learn to stay, we move into thee deeper layer of working with boredom. We are not running from our experience, We are learning to face it and be with what is.

Boredom is a feeling. An emotion. We can practice the same process in other emotional or negative aspects of feelings we battle regularly.

So the next time you get bored, try staying with it a moment so you can begin to build a better process of understanding you and your actions in this space.

Procrastination

Now, Let's talk about procrastination and how mindfulness can help you. Procrastination seems to be a universal human problem. We all struggle to get moving or most important tasks, writing the screenplay, writing that script, reading that book, launching that website, launching that website . important projects bring up unpleasant emotions like boredom, anxiety and fear. Procrastination is a coping mechanism to help us avoid the strong emotions. If we ignore that school paper and put it off until tomorrow our mood improves instantly. That we feel short-term release.

The problem of course is what happens over the long-term. By avoiding the important undertakings we have the potential to squander opportunities and damage our reputation on our relationships and hurt our self-esteem. In a self-defeating storm avoidance we can become our own worst enemy. While procrastinating we often lack awareness by what's happening on a deeper level. This is where awareness and emotional self-control can serve us. 

Here a few helpful tools to use the next time you are stuck in the quicksand of procrastination.

First, notice the resistance. When you feel that pang of anxiety or reach for that source of distraction, notice what emotions or thoughts are bubbling beneath. Perhaps you're dreading the boredom of delving into that project. Maybe you observe a deep fear of failure and worry that you don't have the ability to succeed. Then it could be a combination of these or other factors. 

Second, keep in mind what’s at stake.  Reflect a moment on what the outcomes will be if you continue to delay and ask yourself if the short term relief right now is worth a bad mark in that class, or a risk to your career, reputation with friends or family. Your fear of failure keeps you locked in avoidance. Ask yourself if this short term relief is worth a delayed outcome.

Third, give yourself a reward system.  Nothing wrong with that. Give yourself permission to indulge in a comfort or pleasure once you put in a solid working session or a full days work. Incentives can powerfully harness our motivation even if its something simple like an hour of Netflix or a bowl of ice cream.

Finally lets utilize one of the most important skills of being mindful which is, the ability to maintain focus on the present moment. Remain aware moment by moment as distractions arise and with that awareness, keep pulling yourself back over and over. Strengthening the muscle to stay strong a midst temptation. Important to remember when working through procrastination is to practice non-judgment and self compassion. We all experience delays, distractions and diversions. As we learn and practice all we can do is focus on the moment right in front of us Which if we are mindful, has the potential to lead way towards progress and possibility.

Just remember, the approach you take in any situation will determine the outcome.

Be happy and healthy my friends.