Self Love

I know self love can be one of the hardest things a person can do. It has taken me years upon years to look at myself in the mirror and love who I am. In a society where we're taught that what we are isn't enough, loving who you are is a long and sometimes painful process. We're often told that how we look isn't what society deems "beautiful." Fads and beauty trends change every year and it's hard to keep up, especially when you're young and changing. You could be the "it" girl/boy and the next year, that look is out and you're back to being shamed for not having that "it" look.

I have been a thin girl my entire life. I have had a lot of food allergies and stomach problems that make eating a healthy and well-balanced meal hard. I was underweight for my height and age and have been up until a few years ago. I would always get those cliché "you should eat a hamburger, put some meat on your bones" lines. I've had people do that thing where they see how many fingers they can wrap around your wrist and have it touch the thumb. I know what you're thinking, Wow being skinny must be SO hard. It's not just about being skinny, it's any weight in general. Skinny was the desirable body type for years. Nowadays, having a big butt and boobs to match with a skinny waist is what's "desirable" by society. If you don't have a certain body type, you're ridiculed for it. It's been this way for years and it'll never change, unfortunately, especially now that social media is so prevalent. How you view yourself can change though.

We all have insecurities. I have struggled with mine for as long as I can remember. I hated how big my nose is. I hated my smile. I hated how my eyebrows are light and look better filled in. I hated how imperfect my skin is. I hated how skinny I am. I could go on and on. What's important is how I got over all that insecurity and hatred for myself.

In my first year of college, my best friend asked me to help her with her photography class. All I had to do get in front of the camera and let her do her thing. The pictures she took turned out great. I realized I had a genuine talent and love for modeling. Since then, I have taken hundreds and hundreds of pictures. I've landed three modeling gigs as a brand ambassador for three companies. I spend a lot of my time thinking of new photoshoot ideas and outfits to go with it. I feel AMAZING when an idea becomes a reality and I get some good shots. I owe most, if not all, of my confidence and self love I have acquired to modeling. You can find that, too.

You can learn to love yourself and you deserve more than anything to find that love. Loving yourself doesn't mean just loving how you look on the outside, but also taking care of yourself, too. Look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself every single day how beautiful you are. Compliment yourself. If your makeup looks good that day, that's something to love and be proud of. If you love the outfit you're wearing, take a picture in it and post it confidently. If your skin is glowing and you feel good, remember that feeling and hold onto it. Its the little things, day by day, that matter.

Take care of yourself physically, too. If you're stressed from work, take a bath when you get home and relax. You deserve it. If you have a test to study for, remember to take a break and eat a good meal. If you need a mental health day to just chill and not think about your responsibilities, take one and do whatever it takes to get yourself calm and ready to keep going. Go out with your friends. Spend time with your family. Go for a walk. Listen to your favorite band. Self love is a lot more than loving your outside, its very much about loving your insides too.

You deserve to look at yourself in the mirror and be content with the person looking back at you. It's a process. Take, every day, one step at a time and just remember: you're doing your best, and that's enough.