ON BEING VULNERABLE

I truly remember few teachers at my university who actually impacted me. One of them was the Neuro-psychology professor who one day wanted to show us something about being vulnerable.

He did an experiment. He would walk through the class, while we were all quiet and when we would least expect it, he would yell at someone and hit their desk, on other times, he would grab someone by surprise as if wanting to hurt them. He was very experimental and full of ideas. What this was supposed to teach us, was the fact that some of the students yelled back in horror, some of them would not even move and be like that did not even happen, and some of them smiled or remained calm, waiting for a clue on why this is happening as to know how to react next.

The persons that reacted in one way or another were described as being vulnerable. The others, who were serene and relaxed, were described as being either used to being exposed to such “noise” or change (and especially easy to adapt to changing environments) or as being extremely alert.

The vulnerable people who got scared and reacted according to their emotion at the time, were people who were quite open, they were authentic people and very communicative.

The definition of the word:

EXPOSED TO THE POSSIBILITY OF BEING ATTACKED OR HARMED, EITHER PHYSICALLY OR EMOTIONALLY; CAPABLE OF OR SUSCEPTIBLE TO BEING WOUNDED OR HURT, AS BY A WEAPON; OPEN TO MORAL ATTACK, CRITICISM, TEMPTATION;

I cannot say I am vulnerable or even have the courage to be vulnerable. Being vulnerable means so much more than open. It is being present, in the moment, living the NOW and accepting whatever happens in this moment. Being vulnerable is so intimate because it means you are willing to share your true self and not fear any potential criticism or harm or attack. It means to surrender yourself to the Universe entirely. To be at the hand of God, to be so serene and to have tranquillity as your modus operandi.

Being vulnerable is like going naked on the street. Accepting the gazes you receive, even if they are filled with hate, dislike or love and affection. It’s like having cellulite and wear shorts, and feel wonderful in your own skin. It means accepting your flaws, embracing your nature and your life. Your present life. It means to be one with the present moment.

Being vulnerable means revealing your authenticity. You are easily open to everyone and everything. You are the Yes type of person.

Being vulnerable most of all, it means you are courageous.

Choosing vulnerability means to love all your self. It means to reveal all of you, it means you do not worry so much and thus, are prone to more happiness. To experience more happiness and serenity. And that comes simply because you are open to it.

“WHEN YOU START HIDING THINGS AWAY, THAT’S WHEN THE DARKNESS CREEPS UP. SUNLIGHT IS THE BEST DISINFECTANT.” ~ STEVE KAZEE

When you are vulnerable, there is nothing that you hide from the world or from yourself. You don’t lie to yourself, you live according to your values and you are open for suffering. You do not hide your tears as they mean you had the courage to suffer.

BECAUSE TRUE BELONGING ONLY HAPPENS WHEN WE PRESENT OUR AUTHENTIC, IMPERFECT SELVES TO THE WORLD, OUR SENSE OF BELONGING CAN NEVER BE GREATER THAN OUR LEVEL OF SELF-ACCEPTANCE.” ~ BRENÉ BROWN

I have always been mysterious to the world. When people meet me, can think 3 things: either I am mysterious or playing mysterious or I am shy or I am full of myself. And although shyness would be a trait I have, it does not define me. As soon as I gain confidence in whatever I perform, I am powerful. However, shyness is a self defence mechanism in a way, because it actually shows that I am afraid of opening up, being fearful of not showing perfectionism, so in a way it is displaying my true nature of not being perfect, first of all (and wishing to achieve it) and the fact that I am not open or vulnerable. I am not showing my authenticity.

I play it safe. And when I read this...

“A SHIP IN PORT IS SAFE, BUT THAT’S NOT WHAT SHIPS ARE BUILT FOR.” ~ GRACE HOPPER

… I knew that was me. I am very cautious, very careful, and I tend to calculate and control myself a lot. Because I am afraid of who I can be, say or of what might happen if I do that. I tend to avoid complications. I want it easy, fun, fast. I am not tranquil.

We are all careful and controlling in our own ways. The real challenge is to not let that trait rule our entire life. There are circumstances in life when we must choose that attitude. And there are moments in life when we need to let go.

I AM LETTING GO.

I want to show more of myself and share more of what I think and believe. And this is why this blog/site exists.

“UNZIP THE CASING OF YOUR PERSONALITY AND LET THAT INNER LAYER FEEL THE AIR. SMART WARM LIFE. DO IT IN FRONT OF ANOTHER BEING.” BENT LILLY

Whatever you are doing, or whomever you have become, I recommend to try this lifestyle and to stop rejecting whatever life throws at you. I know for a long time I had been refusing to accept certain things that are happening and creating my life. It’s time to stop. If you are doing the same thing, stop too.

Because when we are so concerned with denying our choices, our lifestyles, our lives, our jobs, our experiences, we are caught in that emotion, rejecting the challenges we receive, but not only that, we do not make room for something else to come our way. We cannot see the opportunities that present themselves, because we are too busy complaining and being unhappy with our lives.

AS C.S. LEWIS POINTS IT OUT: “COURAGE, DEAR HEART.”

and I do whisper that to myself, too.

DO YOU ?

Share this with your precious people.