Motivation in Life and Love
A Few Passages I Wrote Revolving Around Success, Relationships, and Human Emotions
A Simple Yet Strong Motivator for Success
Everyone has a voice, whether or not they believe so. And even if they say they don’t, everyone has dreams that they want to pursue, stories that they want to share, and ideas that they want to make a reality as they go through life and its many fascinating experiences.
The problem is that people take opportunities for granted, bludgeoning others over the head with how miserable they feel instead of doing something about their crippling misery. They allow their past failures and circumstances to dictate how things will most likely, if not certainly, play out for them in the future.
People shouldn’t settle with lives that they know are unhealthy and unsatisfying. If we all stopped to look at how people who’ve previously been in unfavourable situations are currently faring in their environments, we’d realize that we are also just as capable of orchestrating our way out of that never-ending tunnel by creating our own light.
We cannot allow ourselves to take disappointment and rejections personally, or else they will stint our growth by eating away at us. Just like every foreign path we come across, every step we take throughout the journey is unique. We have to accept the unpredictability of our choices and advancements, because we will eventually have to learn how to adapt to uncertainty if we are to develop as life planners.
We may always not have all of the answers in front of us, and even if we did, they may end up not being the ones that we were looking for in the first place. We must devise our own answers based on our interactions with this unfamiliar world if we are to figure out what success means to us.
Even if it seems like it won’t work out, we need to conquer our fears and trust that what we are doing will at least help us understand what we must do in order to improve our situation. There are times when we must face our confusions alone, but we also must remember that we are not alone in finding the greatness within — whatever that means.
Why I Like Seeing Others Happy
You often hear people say that they generally wish for humanity what they’d wish upon themselves. While it’s definitely true that we should value ourselves just as how we might hold others in high esteem, in my case at least, this isn’t the only reason I find joy in, well, other people’s joy.
I see human life as I would a flower; I want to watch it bloom and embellish all that surrounds it with its allure and healthful vibes. I might even help it grow as much as I can by watering it and feeding it fertilizer when necessary; but after all, by using its resources and instincts, it’ll know what to do best.
Communicating with flowers and understanding how they behave is a calm, patient and atmospheric activity. It prompts us to internalize such a mindset, and reflect upon how important it is to enjoy the phenomena that make our world a fascinating place.
Inasmuch as we are productive people who are always looking to better ourselves, we are also observers of wondrous spectacles. We can’t experience ourselves the same way we experience others. We appreciate natural and manmade creations, do we not? Well, the earth would certainly be dull and uninspiring if it weren’t for the beings with the abilities to actualize and preserve from the onset.
The very act of sharing with one another, whatever the nature of the exchange may be, is the greatest gift that could ever be bestowed upon a living soul. We are social spirits who not only seek approval, but also bring harmony to our surroundings by contributing to feelings and aspirations greater than our individual selves.
Yes, seeing others happy makes me happy too, but even then there still appears to be a degree of selfishness. What I mean by this is, ideally, we should desire what other people desire themselves, and not just want what we believe is best for them.
On the one hand, advice can be precious; but then again, people will usually gain a sense of where they’re headed down the road through experience. Though, this isn’t to say that we shouldn’t share our observations with one another. We just shouldn’t necessarily expect things to go a certain way, as every person is different.
But at the end of the day, do I really need a reason to rejoice in human happiness? It is the mere feeling that motivates us, that romances us, that shapes our well-being. I personally would find pain in someone else’s suffering, as it is simply not a good feeling for either one of us. They deserve to indulge in all that is beautiful just as much as I do. Expressing gaiety could very well be enough to show someone that there is hope in the long run.
Unrequited love doesn’t equate to unworthiness.
Being full of love is literally the best feeling in the world. And you want to feel such a way that makes you happy, right?
Romantic love is this complex and inexplicable connection that very few people can truly have with each other. It’s so way off the spectrum of relationships, instead residing in its own mysterious realm.
Which is why I’m here to tell you that just because someone does not harbour those same confusingly intense feelings for you, it does not mean that you’re not worth it.
We live in a society where I sincerely believe that people are undermining the value of friendship. If you truly love and care about someone, then you would go to great lengths to help and commit to them however you can, because that’s who you are as a person. Not everyone will appreciate this about you. But those who matter, even if they aren’t with you on an intimate level, will still cherish you in spite of the unshared feelings.
That person may not see you that way, and it may very well be the case that they’re just not the right one for you. Compatibility and chemistry are important, though at the same time, I can’t shake the feeling that people often don’t know who’s best for them — if there’s such a concept at all.
We do see situations where a person is in love with another with whom a relationship either is or would be absolutely disastrous, all the while remaining friends with another who thinks the world of them. But this is where my argument for friendship comes in.
How you deal with the situation is a test of your character and growth as a person. If you’re more concerned about the well being of that person, rather than whether or not you’d be the better match for them, that makes you the nobler individual. And believe me, the quality of your virtue will not go unnoticed.
Thus, whether or not someone falls in love with you is not necessarily an indicator of you as a person. There’s so many more complicated things that go into that. And it’s why experiences are meant to have an affect on you, to shape your perspective. If you can get over only thinking about things in a romanticized light, you will learn to understand people on a much deeper level.
Emotions don’t equate to weakness.
It really infuriates me when people say that getting emotional over everything implies that you’re unstable, and thus and unable to handle things rationally and independently.
I completely and totally disagree with that. Showing emotion means you actually care about what’s going on, that it means something to you, and that it’s teaching you to reflect on how you view things.
It’s these emotions that shape your judgement and philosophy. If you didn’t have any sort of emotional investment in something, then it means you haven’t formed an opinion on what to do or say about it.
You’re a lot more likely to speak your mind and actually feel empowered by admitting to your emotions. It’s the people who go through emotional experiences that can best understand the psychology behind others' motives and mentalities.
At the end of the day, it’s the individuals who feel something that are going to get things done, because they’ve gone through the emotional stages that help guide them to the best way to approach their predicament — the way that works for them. These stages are also a reflection of how and why people might be affected in certain ways based on their past experiences, and therefore how they’ll grow, become stronger, and become considerate individuals.
We genuinely emotional people are not attention-seekers, nor do we ask for sympathy. We just want people who are supposedly hardened by pride to understand where we’re coming from and why we react to things the way we do.
I don’t care how many more times in my life I’ll cry or feel intensely about something, because I’d rather speak out about something that I care about, and I know for a fact that it’s this way of thinking that I can confide in to tell me what’s right for me.