Moral Honesty

Recently I listened to the Brilliant Idiots podcast and it made me think about moral honesty — the ability for us as people to speak our truth even when there could be repercussions. As simple as this seems, this can be very difficult for us all. I question why we feel the need to hide who we are and our systems of belief. Moral honesty is necessary for our progression as people even though it can be more comfortable to walk with the crowd.

The reality is that we all judge. It done both consciously and unconsciously. At some point we traded empathy and relating to people for ridicule. It could also be our personal development. If our loved ones frowned upon certain things then chances are we shy away from those very things. What happens when one of the characteristics that is a part of who you are is the very same thing these loved ones frown upon? For example, how can we believe in freedom and equality while judging people for their religious beliefs? That is a more serious example, however, it speaks to how we approach these matters.

I have struggled with being morally honest in situations at jobs. How do you answer a supervisor who asked if they are bias in dealing with all their staff including you? The obvious answer would be to say no you have never been bias even if it is not true. This answer only allows for this behavior to continue and never change. I danced around the question to save my job. I replied that she does treat us differently due to our different personalities and needs. I thought in the moment I was expressing that she treats us differently without coming across as an enemy. I knew she could and would be spiteful depending on how I answered. Ironically I left that position for this very same bias. I guess that was my karma.

I have also struggled with my beliefs on health. Coming from a southern family, I definitely enjoy southern foods. I was also raised with a heavy Caribbean influence from extended family. My point in saying this is that I love all types of foods. I came from a family that equated weight with health. The bigger you are the more unhealthy you are. Nobody instilled healthy routines in me. Nobody taught me the importance of remaining active or preparing meals a certain way (portion control, balanced meals, etc.). I found myself as an adult wanting to be more healthy and promote health however, I am constantly fighting bad habits. This requires constant moral honesty on my part. I had to be honest with myself in saying I allowed myself to become inactive and extremely unhealthy. This allowed me to then move toward solutions. Being my own worst critic made this difficult but necessary.

I think it is most difficult for us to be morally honest in relationships. With this type of honesty comes vulnerability that most of us are not ready for. It is absolutely difficult to show someone a piece of you that you don’t even like acknowledging. It becomes even harder when the person on the receiving end is judgemental. We have to leave room for people to express themselves freely even if we do not understand or agree.

A society where we leave room for moral honesty promotes progress. It allows us to address obvious issues. We cannot think of it as disrespect or judge those who reveal personal parts of themselves. I appreciate the Brilliant Idiots podcast for evoking this thought process. Let's continue to grow and learn.