Maybe a Sign

Out For a Walk

The doctor lets me know every visit that I need to get some sun and exercise. I am not a big fan of going to a gym or using that stay at home fitness stuff on the game console. So I occasionally venture outside and go for a walk. The doctor tells me that I need to do those things because in 2003 I was diagnosed with Ankylosing Spondylitis (A.S). Those are big fancy words that say my immune system attacks the soft material between the joints in my spine causing it to fuse together. The doctor and myself know that by sitting around doing nothing I make it worse on myself. Lack of movement makes the joints more stiff and harder to move. The condition is a genetic autoimmune disease, meaning you have to carry the HLA-B27 gene and at some point come in contact with some type of trigger that activates the gene. It usually starts out in the Sacroiliac Joint which is basically your tailbone or the part that joins your hips to your spine. It feels like a lower back ache in the beginning, but during flare ups I just do not know how to describe it. So what does all of that have to do with signs?

Coins on the sidewalk

I started walking more when we moved to a big city in Texas and I no longer needed the extra car we had. I guess the move worked out for my nephew since I happily shipped the car to him for his birthday. In the end he got a decent car and it makes me happy to know he wasn't the typical teenage male and what they do to cars. That little car was still going last time I checked. But back to walking and what started to happen, the signs. With my neck stiff and difficult for me to look around, I mostly look down as it is hard to look any other direction. If you have never looked at the ground when you walk I will suggest you be prepared to see things that are good and bad. For me looking down brought about something of an odd experience. I started noticing all the things on the ground, like paper money that gets away on a windy day or the iPhone X that fell out of a pocket just laying there waiting to be found. The one that started me on this journey of paying attention to the signs around me is every time I was hurting or had a rough day I would find a coin. This is the part to understand about what I just said, every time I was hurting or had a rough day I would find a coin. If I was in need of something to make me smile or cheer me up there would be a coin. I started seeing the coins as a sign that it could be worse so the coin was placed there as a sign to make me smile. So what I found next really made me think there was something to this sign idea.

Little Red Balloon

I got to the back corner of the very large parking lot where I usually walk around since it is where people who go to nearby concerts and movies park their cars and like to drop things without realizing it. i started to turn the corner and I saw this bright red round shape behind the bushes next to the fence and decided to investigate. I had to look twice because I really couldn't quite grasp what I saw. The bright red thing was a little red balloon and it was just sitting in the back of the bush up next to a chain link fence. Most balloons I have been around usually pop if you give them the wrong look so I was very surprised that this one had not popped. It had made it through all of the branches, landed on a few odd sharp things on the ground and touching the chain link fence. Any one of those should have popped it but the little balloon was sitting there full of air. How that little red ballon made it to where it was I will never know and I just thought it was a cool thing to take a picture of to share. I didn't know there was more to it than the balloon, I had missed something and did not know it yet.

Little Black Balloon

The Next day I decided to not be lazy for a change and did my walk two days in a row. I had just rounded the opposite corner from where the little red balloon was and I saw this little black shape that at first just looked like trash. When I got a closer look at it I was really surprised to find a little black balloon. It was almost resting against the chain link fence and was nestled under a bush with some thorns on the branches. I looked where the balloon had landed and could not see how it made to that spot without popping. So now I have not one tough little balloon, I had two that somehow managed to stay inflated and land in spots where they should not be without popping. I really did not think about it too much more as my mind was elsewhere and I just took a picture to share later. I continued on to finish my walk and then headed back home. On the way I made the discovery of where the two little balloons had most likely escaped from, I say escape and let me explain to you why.

Popped Balloons on a Rail

As I got to the exit of the parking lot and started down the walkway I noticed that there were red and black balloons tied to the railing in different spots like one does for a party. The thing was that every single one of these balloons had popped and just hanging there. I didn't think to much about it because balloons are so easy to pop and it was a walkway with people or animals touching them. But as i stood there thinking it became very obvious that the too little balloons I found out in the parking lot had been tied up here at some point. Now those two little balloons became even more of an enigma because not only did they make it through the bushes to land on the ground, they most likely bounced their way across an asphalt parking lot to get there. Those two little balloons had to be some tough balloons in my opinion since I doubt either of them really should have made it that far. But then how come they were not still tied to this railing as well. Those two little balloons had untied themselves or became untied somehow if you don't believe balloons can untie themselves, you will have to ask one to see if they give you the secret. Which added to their impossible journey to travel across a very large asphalt parking lot and into a bush landing on the ground in the middle. Was this a sign like my coins? The coins make me happy and smile, what was the message or was this something else.

You Got This

What I have not said yet was there was another reason I went for a walk for those two days straight and a couple of more after that. At that time it seemed like everything just started going downhill faster and faster. I don't want to share too many details about everything that was going wrong other than to say several major life impacting things took a very bad turn for the worse and I really had no idea what I was going to do or where to even start to get back on track. As I was standing there looking at the balloons still tied up and deflated I realized something, this has to be a sign. Those two little balloons were a message to me, well at least that is how I took it. You may think something different and that is very much ok, you have your own thoughts and opinions and I am very glad we all are not sharing the same ones. I came up with the sign idea when I first started finding the coins. I became curious if there was any ideas or thoughts about finding them and did a web search while I was taking a break from researching how to repair our washing machine. All of these websites for guardian angels came back from the search. I thought about it and it was a moment that changed the way I look at the world. I realized that finding the coins made me happy and smile, but I didn't think what state of mind I was in when I found them. They most definitely were a sign in my opinion.

Do Not Search for Signs

As I said earlier I never found any coins if I actually went looking for them. That is not to say that you won't find any if you go looking, it's just I only found them when I need a happy moment or something to bring a smile to my face. That is when the balloons tied up to the railing made me think about my life and my current situation. At the moment I felt like the deflated balloons that were still tied to the railing and hanging from their strings. It seemed like my world had been deflated and I was hanging there with no hope and no answers to help me make the situation better. But I soon had to change that thought since two little balloons made it all the way across the lot, into the bush to land on the ground without being popped or still tied to the railing. When you think you have found your solution you can get yourself hyped up and tell yourself that you can do this. But if there is nothing to inspire you that it is actually possible that you will succeed then you may or may not. Those two little balloons gave me that very real, very possible motivation and confidence I needed to get things turned around. It seems odd to put so much thought into a balloon under a bush, but if you actually think about what it took for that balloon to get there without popping you may see my point. Add in that you saw the balloon at a time when you need the inspiration and strength to get past whatever obstacle you are facing. Take a leap of faith and see things as a sign there may indeed be a guardian angel watching over you and leaving signs to guide you. Putting coins in your path to get you to smile and balloons nestled in a thorny bush to get you past the hardships of life. But don't forget that you probably should not go out just to look for the signs, you will only see them at the moment you need them.